Negative comments from old aunts, etc...
Find a Conversation
| Sun, 11-19-2006 - 9:18pm |
Ever since I turned 25, I get tactless comments from my family as to why I'm not married yet, and since my last break-up, have virtually no prospects. Do you get them too? Any good replies to share??? Here are a few of the ones I've been asked...
Aunt Georgia: "Are you seeing anyone?" No, not right now. "Well you have plenty of time, how old are you now?" 30 [Then she had a look of horror on her face and there was a really awkward pause!)
My 12 year-old niece is infamous for asking me about getting married or having a baby and she did this again in the middle of a family BBQ which I attended "with myself": "When are you gonna get married?" To which I replied: "I dunno. Did you get your period yet?" She hasn't asked me since!!! I know it's awful that I said that!
Then my brother-in-law always asks me really loud in front of people almost as if he's TRYING to embarrass me. Then he offers advice "Well have you tried going to..." as if the reason I'm single is a lack of where to socialize...
What's a girl to do??

Pages
Lou
Everytime someone posts this dilemma I just thank the stars above that NOBODY and I mean NOBODY in my family does this. I am amazed at the horror stories that I read about it and I cringe, I mean don't us singletons put enough pressure on ourselves without aunt naggypants doing it as well???
My friend K's family does this constantly, for the longest time she would say "When Dick and Jane have a baby" and that would shut people up because her cousin (names changed to protect the innocent) and her husband were childless by choice and were going to remain that way but OOPS her cousin accidentally got pregnant recently, not happy about being pregnant but now my friend can't use that witty comeback anymore because her cousins pregnant. *sigh* I'm amazed that people are this bold and this RUDE.
It won't stop once you are married, then it's when are you going to have a child, then when you have the first child it's when are you going to have another one...it never ends...A woman at work would nag at my friend so much about when her and her husband were going to have kids that she had to finally tell her that she had serious endometriosis and there was a pretty good chance it may never happen. THat shut her up...but really you shouldn't have to resort to any of that.
I'll say it again, thank the stars above my family does not do this to me.
Smile,
Deirdre
just few more tips, even though sometimes these remarks from relatives, etc make you upset or mad, it's not always easy to give out the really, really good and sassy comebacks, esp the ones that can be equally on the offensive, such as "I"ll tell you when I'm getting married when you tell me you're getting divorced". Sometimes it's easier to laugh the remarks off with some of the other comebacks, such as the "crystal ball is in the shop" or the "I'm going to go shopping at the man store tomorrow; I'll be sure to call and tell you what I find!" Unfortunately some folks will still press on in their quest for more information, and that becomes tricky to negotiate sometimes, esp if you are in the middle of a large gathering. Stick to the humor if you can and even line up/call out for an ally, such as another single relative who might understand you and support you. Then point out, aloud, the ludicrousness of the subject to your supporter. Or, if there is no support around you, then try to change the subject. And, just silently remind yourself that these folks have nothing better to think about in their lives and that they are too narrowminded to appreciate you as you are.
Please don't misunderstand me - I wish I could say those super sassy comebacks, esp those that I think of the next day, but sometimes when you feel on the spot, it's easier to stick with humor and turn the tables back on the person doing the insulting, ie laugh right at them to their face at the ridiculousness of their questions/remarks.
Today is thanksgiving and I know more family/friends get togethers are coming up and some of us will need these comebacks to be fresh in our head!
Cheers and good luck to all!
Found this online....
Top 10 Snappy comebacks to " Why aren't you Married yet?"
10. You haven't asked yet.
9. What? And spoil my great sex life?
8. Just lucky, I guess.
7. I'm waiting until I get to be your age.
6. I wouldn't want my parents to drop dead from sheer happiness.
5. I guess it just goes to prove that you can't trust those voodoo doll rituals.
4. What? And lose all the money I've invested in running personal ads?
3. We really want to, but my lover's husband just won't go for it.
2. I don't want to have to support another person on my paycheck.
1. Why aren't you thin?
Good I'm glad you'll use it!
Pages