OT--annoying friend

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
OT--annoying friend
3
Tue, 07-08-2014 - 1:20pm

I'll try to make this condensed.  I have a group of single women friends that I hang out with--we dance, go to the movies, out to dinner,etc.  There is one person in the group who has really been getting on my nerves lately.  I have concluded that she has no class.  She over-reacts to perceived slights from service people or strangers.  Lately I have noticed that she complains a lot about food when we go out to eat and I am wondering if she does it on purpose to try to get free meals--that did happen one night and another time we got a free dessert, so I guess that would encourage her to keep doing it.

I can certainly just call up one person and go out somewhere.  But it's difficult when it's group things, like everyone is meeting (or going together) to a dance or when she calls and asks if we are all going to a place.  Sometimes she will call me and I will just not answer (thankful for caller ID) but it's hard to totally get her out of the picture.  I guess there is not much I can do except not specifically invite her, or she's fine if we do something like going to a movie.

Avatar for floridagirl52
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-16-2006
Tue, 07-08-2014 - 3:54pm

I think some people just need a lot of attention. There's a woman I know who I've been out to dinner with along with other people. I don't know her that well, so it's not like she'll ever call me to do anything. But she's one of these people who says she has a million allergies, including food allergies. Basically, she can't eat anything, it seems. So, she gives the waitress the third degree about everything, "Is it olive oil or canola oil in the salad dressing?" The waitress has to go ask the chef. And she's just so bossy and unpleasant about it. What she ought to do is just order broiled chicken with plain rice and leave it at that or just don't go out to eat. And then, she goes on to regale us with all of her physical ailments. It's sad, actually. But I don't have to like it.

Community Leader
Registered: 07-16-2001
Tue, 07-08-2014 - 4:51pm
My married girlfriend is like that. She takes everything personally. I've decided it's because she really has an over-inflated sense of importance. She can't stand it if she's not the one getting attention. At one point, I decided to stop walking on eggshells and call her on it. I can't remember the circumstances, but she was going on and on about how a certain person who she'd never met before had left because of her. I flat out told her I doubt it had anything to do with her because he barely even noticed her there. She cried. It had to be said, though. Sometimes, if it's really important enough, I just have to speak up.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
Tue, 07-08-2014 - 4:52pm

I have a friend who has GERD and there is a big list of things she can't eat--if she eats something on the banned list, she is very sick afterward.  It's actually not that fun for her to go out to eat and spend a lot of money on plain things, but then again she doesn't want to stay home all the time either.  So many people don't believe that it's a problem that she has to emphasize to the waitress "I can't eat this due to medical reasons."  But aside from the ordering, she is not unpleasant to deal with.