Philosophy of Dating
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| Fri, 07-07-2006 - 3:10pm |
Don't get me wrong I'm not fussing or whinning...I want to see what your philosophy is on Dating and how to choose or not to get serious with a guy.
Should you date until you find the "one" like we heard?
Should you wait until you find a guy that you have always wanted (even though not prefect) or should you settle for a guy that you know really likes you...Even though you are not so crazy about him?
How many dates go you give a guy before you know that things will not "click"?
Ok I know a lot of questions...and yes I have dated before. I have had two long term relationships one for 6 years and one for over a year. I have dated others and normally the ones that I date I tend to like more then they like me and I end up single or unhappy.
So now the tables have turned... I have been on 4/5 dates with a guy that is nice and all the right things but I'm really not into him. I don't feel like I really like him like that...but I know he really likes me and would seriously date me.
Problem is he is not the only one...it seems like the last 3 or 4 guys I have dated I did not feel that passion or click or link with.
Does that only happen when your younger or should it happen everytime you find someone that you should date seriously?
My friends say to wait..that if its meant to be then it will and you will know when you met the one! But is that right or a not?
Just wondering!
Thanks for your time!

I would not continue to go on dates with a guy I didn't have any chemistry with after 4-5 dates. I think you've given him enough of a chance--that's about the most dates I'll go on before giving up. I tend to feel chemistry right away or not at all--I have never had it grow, although I know people who have (which is why I give guys I otherwise like a few dates just in case!).
And I would definitely not settle for someone who liked me but for whom I didn't feel any chemistry.
I also don't believe in "the one"--I think there are many people who are potentially right for us.
I'm 47 and I definitely have felt chemistry recently ;-), so it's not something that just happens when you're younger. However, having chemistry is just ONE factor--it doesn't mean the person is right for you just because you have chemistry.
Sheri
I think I'll date until I find "good enough."
Just to clarify, for me, chemistry is as much if not more about really hitting it off with someone and having great conversations, as it is physical attraction. I'm attracted to plenty of different guys--but I only have *chemistry* with a few. I have to have both parts of chemistry (attraction and hitting it off personality wise) in order to be interested in going beyond a few dates with someone.
Sheri