Please Give Me Advice
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| Tue, 03-14-2006 - 5:53pm |
About three weeks ago my boyfriend and I of nearly two years broke up. He was my first love and I was pretty sad at first, but I got over it quickly as I realized that life was better without him and that he had never really treated me the way I wanted anyway. I'm starting to feel that towards the end of our relationship I was hanging on to him as a habit despite my waning feelings for him.
Now this new guy comes along and becomes interested in me very quickly. I am so attracted to him too, but I feel like if I get involved with him too fast I'll be some kind of a Gertrude or something (the Queen in Hamlet who got remarried just two months after the king died.) Is there some kind of a courtesy period after a serious break up that I shouldn't be seeing anyone? I'm afraid if I turn down NewGuy now that I might lose him. And no, I don't believe I'm rebounding; he just came at this point in time...
Dazed & Confused,
~Allison

I agree with the other posters that there is no timeline. Especially if, at the end of your relationship, you had already started the process of letting go of your ex. (I've been there, and I know that can happen).
My only caution would be to be honest with NewGuy. He might feel hurt or deceived if he doesn't know that you just came out of a long-term relationship. As long as he knows, you should be able to move forward at a comfortable pace for both of you.
Good luck with your new beginnings. :)
AJ, enjoying life with C.