Problem Attracting Men

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-03-2003
Problem Attracting Men
27
Mon, 05-28-2007 - 8:27pm

I don't want to sound all self centered or something but I don't think I am a bad looking person at all. I've been told I have a wonderful attitude (some friends call me giggles) and I am smart with a wonderful job. I was in a relationship on and off for nine years. Now that I am back in the market, which I've been for a while, I feel like I know nothing about dating. Not only do I feel like I know nothing about dating, when I go out, chances are every old man in the place will talk to me but nobody my age will attempt a conversation. They will tell me I am gorgeous but won't stick around to talk to me. I am 31yrs old but looks 25 at times. Hahahaha! This dry spell has been going on for a while. Initially, I didn't care much since I felt like I was still finding my way around the dating world but after a year, I am freaking out!! hahaha! I know I am laughing but I am serious. I've had some guys tell me I intimidate them? How do I manage to do that without even talking to them?? I've heard that line so many times it's getting to be annoying! I just wanna date and find me a man but I guess that's gonna be one hell of a ride since wherever I go, if there are octogenarians there, they will find me and chat me up. I absolutely have no problem with that but what happen to the guys my age? Help.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-30-2007
Thu, 05-31-2007 - 10:21am

I don't know kid. (-: I got married at 26 . . . devoiced in 04 . . and even got into a relationship that I was dedicated to for almost a year and a half after that. (-: Not like I am full of answers . . probably why I am here. Breaking my on circle and talking to normal people. (-:

Back when I was young, I did a lot of scuba diving .. .my involvement with the dive shop got me connect to similar thinking people. In time I might have to get back "into" something. (-:

What I find interesting . . when I went to family parties with my ex girl friend . . .the rooms were full of single, nice, decent woman . . . and men. (-: The problem is a lot of the more "stable" people are wrapped up in a circle of friends or family, are like us and don't find it fun in the clubs and bars . . . the world if full of possibilities. It is just a little random bumping into someone I think.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-26-2006
Thu, 05-31-2007 - 10:30am
HA! I've had the same problem for three and a half years (one would be a cakewalk, honestly) and I'm 22! I had a summer romance-type thing last year and that's IT. And yes, I'm cute, fun, down to Earth, etc, etc. I was complaining to one of my friends a while ago and she reminded me that things tend to be feast or famine; last summer I still wasn't in a relationship, but I had one guy that I was dating and another guy that I'd been dating in the spring trying to date me again and then ANOTHER that I'd dated almost a year before trying to see me again. So...I'm just waiting this phase out and hoping for the best.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-26-2006
Thu, 05-31-2007 - 10:34am
Ugh, I hate when people do that...one guy on the subway told me to smile more once. It's the SUBWAY, come on!! Not the happiest place on Earth!
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-30-2007
Thu, 05-31-2007 - 3:31pm

The worst part is you know those "old" flames are running backwards because they cant find a date ether. LOL

I have to say it is a little calming just to know I am not the only one out here that struggles with the search a little. (-:

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-26-2006
Thu, 05-31-2007 - 3:42pm

Well gee, thanks! :)

No, it's probably partially that and a good break of them tend to cut off contact with me in favor of goofy and/or ditzy girls, then they come back saying that they want to date someone "real." Uhhh, shoulda thought of that before you ditched me the first time.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-30-2007
Thu, 05-31-2007 - 4:25pm

Kid, I never go back, even when tempted. (-: If it doesn't work the first time . . . .al that.

Oh and sorry. LOL Did not mean it that way. LOL
Just an obvious observation unless they are cheaters and jugglers. ((-:

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-30-2007
Thu, 05-31-2007 - 4:32pm
Hey,
I did start the subject as a topic, meeting over 40. Just one post so far, but she really did have some good thoughts and interesting resources. Thought you might want to see hers . . .tall girl . . .something. (-:

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