Question for the day

Avatar for cl_shywon
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
Question for the day
4
Thu, 09-11-2003 - 1:04pm
Do good people do bad things?

Is it easier to forgive someone who is "good" when they mess up than it is someone who is "bad"?

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-07-2003
Thu, 09-11-2003 - 1:57pm
Interesting questions!

Do good people do bad things?

Absolutely - everyone does good and bad things at some point - after all, we're human. No one is perfect. A "good" person who does something bad, though, will try to make amends/apologize and learn from the mistake.


Is it easier to forgive someone who is "good" when they mess up than it is someone who is "bad"?

First of all, I don't think it's possible to neatly lump people into "good" and "bad" categories - I think everyone has some good and some bad in them, it's just a question of how much of each a person has and which predominates. That said, I do think it is easier to forgive someone who is predominantly good when they screw up because it is out of character for them and so even if they occasionally mess up, you're probably receiving more good out of the relationship than bad. Whereas if someone messes up constantly, you're probably receiving more bad than good.

Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 09-11-2003 - 2:42pm
Yes, good people occasionally do bad things. The key word is "occasionally". Also, good people realize when they've messed up, they apologize sincerely and do what they can to make amends, and they don't repeat their errors. That's why, IMO, it's easier to forgive someone who is "good".

Sheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 09-11-2003 - 6:10pm
"Do good people do bad things?

Is it easier to forgive someone who is "good" when they mess up than it is someone who is "bad"? "

hey, isn't that TWO questions? ;-)

do good people do bad things? by definition, no.

and its easier to forgive the bad guy.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 09-11-2003 - 6:51pm
As my dad used to say - there' sgoing to be plenty of people you think are "good" that you see headed down south on Judgement Day....and there's going to be plenty of people you think of as "bad" going up north at the same time.

Everybody makes mistakes....we're all human.

We're always doing what our values and priorities justify and entitle us to do.

What is generally not considered overmuch is that people who step outside their values and priorities and boundaries to do something....."feel bad" and usually apologize for the havoc they've caused - and won't do it again. Not just because of the disastrous results for you - but because they don't see themselves as positively as they did prior to take that action.

People at are doing things and saying "I'm sorry"- generally what they mean is they're sorry you were upset by what they did ...not I was wrong to do what I did. And those people are usually repeat offenders...they're doing what their values justify them to do, the results aren't positive for those around them - and they're continuously sorry about you being on the short end of bad results - but they're not changing anything they do to alleviate that reality because they're conducting themselves according to their values.

Erin

quickblade14@hotmail.com