A rant

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-02-2008
A rant
12
Sat, 11-10-2012 - 5:41pm

wow.

I so forgot what it was like to live with teenagers and a bunch of people and I do not like it one bit. BTDT

My son's gfriend has two teenagers and should I say more?? I am greatful she took us in but besides them and my mom and my son griping about it all I am done in  to the max.

Been here ten days and still no power at sis.. Fema is only putting people up in crappy motels in bad areas so not sure if that is the way to go.. Plus they want you to give them your social security number so not sure about that either.. I am asking around for temp housing but what do I do with my mom? MY sis wont co operate with me and she wont even send me some money for her meds or anything. Not to sound mean but I just dont have money to support other people right now.. I dont have it..

trying to get my mom into some rehab or something as she cant walk now and she is not eating and its a mess.. Its just a matter of time..before she is called home if you know what I mean.. I just dont think she should die in someone elses house..

As for me I  thought I put in all of my hard work and karma and life was for me now but that isnt the case.. and I cant believe I am stuck with this mess.

I know no one can do anything so I t hought I would vent a bit.

thanks for listening

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Community Leader
Registered: 07-16-2001
In reply to: freeatlast2008
Sat, 11-10-2012 - 7:03pm

Unfortunately, it's probably going to be a long time before everyone is back to their homes.  Especially if someone's house was destroyed.  It takes a long time to get everything rebuilt.  There are still FEMA trailers in Joplin, and it's been 18 months since the tornado.  It just takes a lot of time and resources to get everything rebuilt.  Even though you're just dealing with a lack of power, I'm sure there were businesses you went to that were destroyed, and that's going to be another hardship.  It's too bad that they can't find temporary housing in a better part of town.  I'm sure they need your SSN to be sure that one person isn't asking for benefits over and over.  I'd be worried if they weren't tracking who they were helping. 

I'm sorry to hear your mom is so sick.  She may not be at home, but she is surrounded by family.  My dad died in the ICU at the hospital, but he was surrounded by family.  He knew we were there, too, even though he was on life support.  I know he knew because his blood pressure shot up the moment I spoke as I walked in the room (hmmm...not sure what that means, though!).  Does she not have Medicare to help with her medicines?  It's too bad your sister won't (or can't) help.  I'm lucky in that, although my family doesn't always get along, we always pull together to help out when it's needed. 

I'm not sure if this helps, but United Way might be able to help with your mother.  I can't find it on their website, but I think I remember the lady who came to talk to us at school saying they provide senior services.  You just call 2-1-1 and you can talk to someone about getting help.

Avatar for cfk_3
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-14-1999
In reply to: freeatlast2008
Sat, 11-10-2012 - 7:54pm
Do they have EFT for bratty, entitled teens? LOL! If not they should! I'm sorry about your Mom, Free. I hope you all can find a solution for her soon. I would think that your SS# would be safe with FEMA. I guess it's a bit of a toss up for you. Risk giving out pertinent personal info and move to a not-so-safe area, or stay there with scary teenagers. Just trying to make you smile, Free. I hope things turn around very soon for you.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-02-2008
In reply to: freeatlast2008
Sat, 11-10-2012 - 8:01pm

well the house is okay but there is no power and we can go back when the power goes back on but could take weeks again..

So if my mom dies here then I guess I just dial 911 .. I would hate for my son and the gfriends kids to see that? that just isnt fair at all?

If she doesnt die then on MOnday I want my sister to take off work and come here and we can take her to rehab or something until maybe she can get better or not . I dont know but dying in a house with kids is not fair.. these people are not family and its not fair to them at all..

My mom has medicare and she gets a check but so far my sister has not sent any money for her. So far I am paying for stuff and I spent 400 dollars for four days in a hotel. I could have left her in shelter or at the house but I would go to hell for that. I called my rich cousins and they didnt answer.. I have other cousins and they could care less..

I just dont think  my mom should die here and that is  my main concern...

As for me I can go and get an apt. somewhere which is fine by me but I cant do that with her still here in h ouse. I am taking care of her all day and night and I have no respite so I will def. find stuff out on Monday.. but her stuff and all is back in the other county we left. YOu see we have counties here and they dont easily transfer from one to the other but I will try.. Atleast we can try and get a nurse here to bath her and all. she wont take a shower or eat and she has been sleeping all day and night. I really think she is being called home.

thanks again

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-02-2008
In reply to: freeatlast2008
Sat, 11-10-2012 - 8:45pm

oh; CFK.. I forgot what it was like with bratty teens. OMG. so when they act up my son vents to me.. Oy Vei. I dont want to get involved in that drama so I just listen to him vent. So I have my mom , him venting to me and the bratty teens .. So its more drama than I would care to deal with right now. Oh;and to top it off this neighborhood is very very bad. Not to knock anyone but there are houses around here that are burned to the ground , and there are gangs around here and you cant go out at night and come home late.. I am just kinda scared around here. Its not a very desirable neighborhood. Dont mean to offend anyone but that is the truth.

okay I did get a laugh out of your post CFK.. I highly doubt things are going to change soon.. I just wish I knew what to do with mom. I guess like I said dial 911..

thanks

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
In reply to: musiclover12
Sat, 11-10-2012 - 10:15pm

I'm sorry that your mom is so sick.  I really hope she isn't at the point where she's going to pass away but the stress of not being in her own place and having to live w/ other people must be getting to her.  I'm sure it's better than being in a motel room, though--at least you must have a kitchen and don't have to sit in one room all day.  I hope you find a solution soon--and your sister really needs to get up there & help you out.  If she has the power of atty, let her deal with all this stuff.

My best friend's 90 yr old mother was living in her own place with her son til she fell & broke her hip & had to have surgery.  Now she's in a nursing home.  My friend has 4 brothers & 3 of them are useless.  The other one manages her money.  But the other 3 are complaining about what nursing home she is in and they think she should go home (where she can't take care of herself) but of course they didn't do any of the work to check out places and they don't help take care of the mom.  It seems like it always comes down to one kid who does the work.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-02-2008
In reply to: freeatlast2008
Sat, 11-10-2012 - 10:45pm

yes I am kinda stuck because i dont have any of the info or the power of attorney. we dont even have much clothes and my mom has no i.d. or anything with her.. Now if I drive an hour away to get her stuff and  then what? take it with me to rehab and then they say you have no jurisdiction over her because your sister has the info??
I just want  my sister to come here and we decide to take mom to rehab for a few weeks so that I dont have to find her dead when I wake up in morning.. but okay if that is what I have to do then okay..

I might just call a rehab on Monday and ask them questions...

I was also thinking that I could get an apt. leave my mom here and that will force my sister to come and take mom to rehab.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-02-2008
In reply to: freeatlast2008
Sun, 11-11-2012 - 9:27am

More ranting I guess.

I know I should be greatful but I never told you guys that I am sleeping in a dining room on  a futon and its been two weeks now.. the area is right next to the kitchen.. Imagine how the poor people living here feel?? they get up at 5 am for school and work and this cant last  much longer.. before they all want us out. then what?

 

Avatar for cfk_3
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-14-1999
In reply to: freeatlast2008
Sun, 11-11-2012 - 12:39pm

I am not a news watcher. It frankly depresses me so please forgive me for being ignorant and asking you to educate me. Why can't you guys go back to your sisters yet? I know the power is still out but I guess I don't understand why. Is it because the roads are inaccessible? Or is it because the clean-up efforts are that extensive? I know they can't allow you guys to live in a danger zone. I know the situation is dire. It just seems like if your area wasn't among the worst hit, you should have power back by now. Again, speaking out of sheer ignorance. I can't imagine not having any personal space. I hope you find some answers on Monday with regard to your mother's care and can move to a less stressful environment.

Avatar for xxxs
Community Leader
Registered: 01-25-2010
In reply to: xxxs
Sun, 11-11-2012 - 12:48pm

 Hi Free:

    Try the homeless agencies.  Many times they have the expertise to obtain ID's etc.  Sometimes they have resources that most people who have never been in that situation do not know how to access.  One can be suprised where information can come from.

chaika

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-02-2008
In reply to: freeatlast2008
Sun, 11-11-2012 - 1:10pm

My area was pretty  hard hit so there is still today to this day no heat, water, electric and nothing so yes we can go back but the area is under marshal law now also.. NO one in or out until its safe.. Lines are down and it a mess there. So not even sure we can get back into the neighborhood without the police .. I have no idea what is going on..and since I have no i.d. for that house and my mom has none with her I have no idea if they will even let us back in right now..

if we do go back we will be without water, heat, electric and cable and food..

 

 

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