This resonated with me

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-17-2008
This resonated with me
6
Fri, 12-16-2011 - 4:33pm

Probably not for everyone, but I was very impressed by the insight and maturity of this 20-something.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-02-2008
Sun, 12-18-2011 - 1:06pm

It reminds me of when I was about 18 years old and I wanted to go to college and get an apt . on my own. I had a boyfriend and My parents said you will go to work as a secretary and marry your boyfriend.. So I went to work as a secretary and married my HS sweetheart and I was so unhappy.. Six years and one baby later I was poor as dirt and a single mom with no education relying on the system when I had to.and still working in dead end jobs because I had no choice at that point.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-26-2011
Sun, 12-18-2011 - 12:35pm

You make an excellent point, Florida.

Avatar for xxxs
Community Leader
Registered: 01-25-2010
Sat, 12-17-2011 - 12:51pm

I think it matters where one is living.

dragowoman

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-17-2008
Sat, 12-17-2011 - 11:30am

I agree.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
Sat, 12-17-2011 - 10:34am

I do agree w/ what she says in the article.

Avatar for floridagirl52
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-16-2006
Sat, 12-17-2011 - 10:06am

It's funny, I read this yesterday too.

In regards to Lori Gottlieb...I agree that the Atlantic article seemed to be saying "Settle for someone just to have a live-in sperm donor." But I felt her book was different. I felt she was saying, "Stop focusing on the bad boys who are 'exciting' and take a second look at the men who would make good husbands and fathers...you could fall in love with them, too." But I wonder how many 20-something's could really do that (with the exception of the author). Generally when you are young, you think you'll live forever with unlimited options (about everything).

So, I agree--don't settle just to be married or to have children or because you need the money. I tell people that getting married is easy--getting divorced isn't. It would be far better to stay single--maybe forever.