Risk/Reward

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Risk/Reward
5
Tue, 04-29-2003 - 6:18pm
Just a little insight into the male brain...

Men deal a lot with risk and reward when they encounter an attractive woman. There are risk takers - ie. they're willing to have their hearts broken for a woman who barely shows them any interest. Then there are guys who are simply unafraid of any situation - they'll approach just about any without fear of any rejection. And then you have guys who are scared to death of risking anything even though the potential for being hurt is very low.

I think this is the main reason why its a bit presumptuous to generalise too much when it comes to judging a man based on his actions when you don't know him that well - men have such a range of motivations for doing what they do (or not do as the case may be) that it's difficult to create an accurate guideline... (women, on the other hand, are all the same)

And you can't group courageous guys and cowards in seperate groups - because men can be courageous in a warzone, but cowards when it comes to chatting up the ladies...


iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: thethimble
Wed, 04-30-2003 - 2:23pm
"You can't generalize men, but all women are the SAME? NOT! Some women approach, some woman don't. Some women play games and try to the 'hard to get' bull. "

hehe. i just threw that out there to get people to respond. ;-)

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: thethimble
Wed, 04-30-2003 - 10:55am
You really believe that don't you? Thats it all some game of risk and reward?

You can't generalize men, but all women are the SAME? NOT! Some women approach, some woman don't. Some women play games and try to the 'hard to get' bull.

I can generalize about men: they are all motivated to find r/ships for sex. At the base instinct...but there are men who disagree with that. So careful about ANY generalizations.

If you are merely approaching someone for the first time, I don't think of it as a risk. I don't even know if they are single yet - I am just meeting someone new. Chances are, he already has a g/f but I enjoy chatting with strangers.

I think when you have this mentality - there is WAY too much pressure. Its all sink or swim. Its not in writing - all black and white.

Go.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: thethimble
Wed, 04-30-2003 - 10:54am
Maybe where you come from - I still see it all the time - for example, I get to meet famous people fairly often - they are out of my league when it comes to dating, and likely the man who was born with a huge trust fund, did all private/ivy league schools is probably out of my league too (but that is totally fine with me, LOL) - but sure Thim - I can be happy with incompatible - it's not out of my league ;-)
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: thethimble
Wed, 04-30-2003 - 10:08am
sorry, but the phrase "in my league" bothers me... it's too high schoolish?

how about "compatible with me"?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: thethimble
Tue, 04-29-2003 - 11:31pm
I think if a man wants to settle down and wants love the risk will be worth the potential reward - and those men typically won't go for someone who is ridiculously out of their league - like a model. I risk too - i risk when I give my heart to someone especially early on (even silently) - i risk it being trampled on - but, if the man seems like a potential partner for me and is basically in my league, I take the risk.