Should I try harder or forget about him

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-07-2006
Should I try harder or forget about him
11
Thu, 09-21-2006 - 10:52am
Ok well my problem is a confusing one, two years ago my sister introduced me to this guys and we kinda hit it off right away after the second date I slept with him and after that we ended up seeing each other alot. We only saw each other during the night because I have kids and I don't think its right for them to see me with other guys unless its a serious relationship. So, we would see each other pretty much everynight and I really liked him the only thing was that he in a way I was ashamed to bring him around my friends he was a different race than me and he was more of ghetto which is what really attracted me to him. So I was with him for a while but I couldn't bring my self to get serious with him after about a year of dating i went to the club and saw an old friend i ended up hooking up with him the next day my guy came over and caught the other guy in my house, he broke up with me because he knew I had cheated on him. At first I was devastated because I felt like after that he was never going to be with me I kinda begged him to forgive me after a couple of weeks of apologizing he decided to give me a 2nd chance so now I tried but my kids father came back into my life after 3 years of not hearing from him my kids father said he wanted to work things out with me so I told my guy that I was going to leave him because I thought that it would be better for the kids.
So there goes heartbreak no. 2 after about 2 weeks of me being with baby daddy I found out he was with another girl and she was pregnant so of course i broke it off with baby daddy and decided i still wanted to be with my guy well everything was good he forgave me once again and even wanted me to move in with him. I told him no because the kids don't know him and it might just confuse them so i told him lets just continue seeing each other the way we have well he was always telling me that I don't respect him and I just use him and he wasn't sure if I really loved him honestly i wasn't sure myself I felt like I did but I never brought him around any of my family and I feel like i was embarrassed of what they might think to me he is not ugly I love his personality and style. So we were toghter again and guess what I met another guy who I thought was my soulmate and yup you guessed it i left my guy once again this time my guy got so upset he locked me in the bathroom and didn't let me come out he got violent but I don't know if i can blame him after all i cheated on him 3 times basically to his face and i didn't look like i cared. Well my soulmate wasn't my soulmate he actually left me for his baby momma my thing is I have been trying to tell my guy that this time is different and I really want to work things out and I want everyone to know he is with me and I am crazy about him but now he says that i have to show him that i am serious but i don't know if i am I think i am i am constantly thinking about him.. But I need advise is this my soulmate and I just haven't realized it or should i stop hurting him and let him go please help

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Avatar for cl_shywon
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
Sat, 09-23-2006 - 10:49am

I don't understand how you can say you saw this man every night, yet your children wouldn't know.

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