Social circles closed?
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| Thu, 03-15-2007 - 10:08am |
Hi everyone,
I was talking to a friend of mine at lunch yesterday, and we were discussing how people make friends as they get older. I made the statement, "I just think that social circles close down the older you get" and by that I mean after your twenties. It is my experience that people do not readily form friendships as they get older; they have their family and maybe a few friends, but they don't seem to be looking to include new people or expand their social circle in any way.
I put this on the singles board because I think this directly relates to having a hard time meeting men. I've always thought meeting men thorugh your social network was really the best (although of course, not the only way).
And by social circle and friends, I really mean people that you are more than aquaintences with. These would be people you could share more intimate/philosophical thoughts with; people who would call you on the weekend to go do something; a group that regularly includes you because they like you, not becuase they feel obligated/feel sorry for you.
So, do any of you experience this? Is it my imagination?

Smile,
Deirdre
I absolutely agree with this, which I think is why Internet dating is so popular with older age groups.
I'm 35 and I can honestly say I have no friends. What friends I did have have all gone their separate ways and I no longer see them but maybe once or twice a year. I have no religious beliefs so I don't belong to any church - although I have seriously entertained the thought of going just to meet people! (Haven't done it because I think it would be just wrong of me.)
I don't even begin to know where to meet people. Not to mention, I don't know when I would have the time.
Only one?
I'm hurt. Boo hoo.
ROFL
I meant that I see in person on a regular basis.
Of course I consider you guys friends but I don't see you quite as often as Ms. Wendie.
Smile,
Deirdre
I know - I was just pulling your leg.
Wouldn't mind get up your way for a long weekend this summer/fall, though.
And wouldn't it be great to grab Anne and all of us converge on Lisa?
I do think there's a tendency towards this but I also think that it can be countered without too much effort. My two closest friends are people I've met in the last 10 years (so since I was in my late 30s)--one I met through a local online community (a group that also met in person fairly frequently) and the other I met through the choir I sing with. But I've also made friends through work in recent years and have made some wonderful friends through these boards (even if I don't see them all the time due to not living in the same place).
One thing that has definitely changed since my early 20s--the things I do with friends now tend to be one on one "quality" time for us to talk and catch up rather than groups going out, which I don't enjoy as much any more. So the opportunity to meet other people through friends isn't as great any more.
Sheri