This sucks
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This sucks
| Sat, 05-20-2006 - 10:13pm |
I am completely and totally FED UP with flakey people...MEN in particular.
How is a woman supposed to find a guy to love and love her when she can't even get a guy to follow through on plans or better yet, even make a freakin' phone call?

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When I notice a pattern in my life, I start examining how I am playing a part in co-creating this. An example is attracting angry women in my life. The anger was underlying, i.e. not like screaming and throwing things but a resentment. They were kind, compassionate women but still had that part of them that showed that resentment toward not only me but toward men. Their past relationships reflected that below-the-surface anger.
I examined this and learned it's all about our family-of-origin. My mother was an angry woman. I read that such women grew up with emotionally distant fathers. Even they loved their fathers, there was this unconscious resentment in not taking care of their emotional needs as children.
I started working on myself in different conscious and unconscious ways (NLP, spiritual, etc.). I see what I attract in my life as a indicator of my spiritual health. I have attracted kind and non-angry women since.
I routinely ask about their childhood whenever I date.
Good luck.
Mark
I agree with Sheri (again !). I don't label this as confrontation but to communicate clearly on how you feel and the impact of his behavior on you. I always appreciate whenever someone does that with me. I hate trying to guess or read in between the lines or not even know if there is something bothering the other.
Mark
Shy,
I subscribe to Occam's Razor principle that basically states the explanation of any phenomenon should make as few assumptions as possible. IMO: Keen men *DON'T* forget dates. Pure, simple and true. Even if he calls and grovels with an abject apology my opinion still holds true. He will disappoint you sooner or later. Like Sheri said, emotionally healthy women wouldn’t give this man a second chance.
Although it's difficult I wouldn't take what he did personally. It happens to everyone but the elite 3% super daters of this world.
I'm assuming he's not all that interested, alright.
'People don't change who they are based on who they are dating. He is who he is. A woman who is right for this guy would be ok with his flakiness'
No, people don't change who they are based on who they are dating; it's just that men who really and truly are keen on a woman they are dating are very similar in that they PURSURE. And they absolutely do not 'forget' dates they have arranged, no matter how generally forgetfull they may be. If a man is truly into you he will - especially in the initial 'butterflies' stage - count days till the date with you, not forget about it.
'Some women would see the behavior you say you want in a man as overwhelming and overly needy'. To me, doing all the chasing in the beginning is not at all overwhelming and needy (unless it's multiple obsessive phonecalls a day but I am not refering to this kind of behaviour).
All I was trying to say is that if this man really was keen she would not have to post angry messages about his behaviour (on non-behaviour). She wouldn't have to debate whether she should call or not, he himself would be doing all the calling.
Just my opinion.
I do believe that the more you tolerate, the more b.s. you get, too.
>Do you realize that if women never gave men second
>chances, no one would be dating or married?
No one would be getting divorced either. They would realise before it's too late that "second chance" men are losers.
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