Throwing caution to the wind

Avatar for cl_shywon
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
Throwing caution to the wind
5
Tue, 10-11-2005 - 8:05am

Do you ever just wanna do what feels good instead of what you know is "right"?

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2004
Tue, 10-11-2005 - 9:08am

Darnit - this is my third and final try responding. Something is wrong with this website this morning.

I do feel that way and I also act on it sometimes. If I do something that has the potential to hurt an innocent person, then I feel guilty. Otherwise, I am pretty good at forgiving myself and others their trangressions. It's part of human nature to test the limits. But it is a gamble and sometimes it works out fine and others it blows up in your face.

Avatar for cl_shywon
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
Tue, 10-11-2005 - 6:51pm

How do you do that?


Because I feel so judged by those around me that I can't seem to stop worrying about if I've done the "right" thing and if my actions will get around and be talked about on the grapevine.


iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2004
Wed, 10-12-2005 - 9:04am

Well, for one thing, my private life is VERY private (part of the reason that I come to these boards). My very closest friends know that I am a basically good person but, like others, am flawed. I can tell them anything and they will not judge me. They might judge my actions and are always blunt and honest and have no problem telling me if something that I have done is reprehensible, but not judgmental. If that makes sense.

In truth, I really don't care much what other people think of me. Before everyone jumps down my throat about that, let me explain a little. When it comes to my career, how people perceive me is very important. I need respect in order to do what I do every day, otherwise I would be pretty darned ineffectual. As for my private life,I have a strong personality and am kind but honest with everyone I meet and there is something no-nonsense about me that makes other people respond to things that I do differently than someone who does not have the courage of their convictions.

Now, I am not saying that you are one of those people, Shy. I don't know you and have never met you and cannot make that disctinction. Though I don't see you as a waffle. I am just trying to explain why I am that way. I just reread this post and I am not sure that it makes any sense. I am having a lot of trouble articulating what it is that makes me able to throw caution to the wind.

Part of it is being at a point in my life where I have accepted that certain things are beyond my control. That's a huge deal for a type-A control freak like myself. But now that I really feel that way, I am more able to take chances. Also, I have self-confidence to the extreme (without the attendant arrogance) and I think that being so sure of myself makes others less likely to question my decisions.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2005
Wed, 10-12-2005 - 9:25am
Maybe one person's way of "throwing caution to the wind" can be different than another. I think the comfort level thing is huge and if you don't feel comfortable doing it, you're not going to like the result, either.
It seems like you're like me, you'd rather err on the conservative side than have to deal with the ramifications of the more liberal choice (I'm talking life, not politics here). So, if this is something you really want to set as your goal, I'd start small. It's you that will be changing because the world around you is going to contain the same people with the same opinions. I am not sure what it is you want to do- bungee jump maybe? ;-) But I'd just remember that if you truly want something different, it will take time. I could tell you lots of stories about this in my own life, but I'll spare you.
Good luck!
Avatar for cl_shywon
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
Wed, 10-12-2005 - 10:54pm

I understand what you're saying.