Wanting what they can't have

Community Leader
Registered: 07-16-2001
Wanting what they can't have
16
Sat, 11-26-2011 - 4:15pm
This is why some women play games. I hate the games, but it's hard not to have a little fun when they work so well.

So my "friend" sent me a text Wednesday night asking if I wanted him to come over. I was out of town and already in bed, so I ignored the text (not even really knowing who I was ignoring). I replied the next morning saying I'd be out of town until Sunday- no response.

Last night, I was bored and had been thinking about him so I texted saying I wished I was in town so we could get together. He seemed to really want to see me. Even after I told him I'd be in touch later in the week, he texted me again an hour or so later expressing how it sucked that I wasn't there. Up until last night, I wasn't convinced that he even cared if I said no or not or that he thought about me much. Could it be because he couldn't have me?

Before I gave in to him, I shot him down several times-for months even (he's previously been known as pervy guy). Even before he started sending me sexual texts, I wasn't more than friendly. He continued to pursue me even after getting shot down. Now that he has me, at least part of me anyway, he's backed off. Until last night. I fully expect to hear from him tonight as well.

He's not a player or I'd understand the "hard to get" unavailable thing working on him. I don't even know for sure yet if I want more, but I do know that I want him to want more with me. So maybe playing the game is the way to go.

I don't think I'll even get the hang of this "men" thing!

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Avatar for cfk_3
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-14-1999
Sat, 11-26-2011 - 5:21pm

I don't know how not to play games.

Community Leader
Registered: 07-16-2001
Sat, 11-26-2011 - 5:34pm
It is a cat and mouse game, and that seems to be exactly how it works. I've never been one to show complete adoration for a man either, especially at first. But that's what they seem to want...while we play hard to get. The thing is, I'm not playing- I am pretty hard to get. But then once I'm gotten I'm there...and then they run.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-02-2008
Sat, 11-26-2011 - 5:45pm

I have to admit that there is some validity to the cat and mouse thing.. I have played the game and I have not.. It seems playing gets you somehwhere.. Your last paragraph is so true..

Avatar for xxxs
Community Leader
Registered: 01-25-2010
Sat, 11-26-2011 - 6:48pm

dragowoman

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-26-2011
Sat, 11-26-2011 - 8:55pm

Kinda pathetic, right? But it works.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
Sat, 11-26-2011 - 10:21pm

Yeah, but one of the Rules ladies also got divorced, so what did she know?

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-26-2011
Sat, 11-26-2011 - 10:56pm

So you know, I think it's partly the guy's fault

Avatar for xxxs
Community Leader
Registered: 01-25-2010
Sat, 11-26-2011 - 11:18pm

dragowoman

Community Leader
Registered: 07-16-2001
Sat, 11-26-2011 - 11:27pm
Marina, I've had pretty much the same experience. The black men who have hit on me have been much more direct. To be honest, they've been too direct for my taste. I'd rather a guy at least attempt a two minute conversation with me first so I can determine if I'd want to give him my number. The ones who have the most success with getting my number are the ones who consistently are nice and try to develop a friendship first.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-24-2011
Sat, 11-26-2011 - 11:34pm

But then once I'm gotten I'm there...and then they run.

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