We finally kissed!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
We finally kissed!!
Mon, 04-14-2003 - 10:55am
IT guy and I finally kissed! I was starting to wonder...LOL...I really was starting to think it wasn't going to go anywhere. He was always interested in seeing each other again, but never made any moves to initiate a date. No car doors opening, no brushes or touches of any kind. All signs were pointing to: friendship.

Then yesterday, we had a 10 hr date. At dinner, I told him that I expected men to initiate. He said, why? women want to be equal then we can't they ever initiate? I said, not in the beginning. I am turned on by confidence and pursuing. Its nature! The alpha male of the pack is the one who mates. I am women, I just say "yes" and thats part of how I determine who I say "yes" to.

Then he said, ah yes! thats right. you have "hot chick" syndrome. And that he has trouble reading me. I am not like any woman he's ever known.

Apparently, he has this theory called "hot chick syndrome" and I have it. It must not be a dealbreaker b/c he opened my car door after dinner...and kissed me when he dropped me off! Obviously, he got the message :-) It was a little quick...and I wished I'd have gone in for more...but it kept me warm all night...sigh...

Still warm and fuzzy! Go.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Mon, 04-14-2003 - 11:37am
That's great Go. Warm and fuzzy is good. :P Many more to come....
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 04-14-2003 - 11:54am
what is this "hot chick syndrome"???

can you elaborate?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 04-14-2003 - 12:47pm
I am not sure...he said he didnt' want to get into it...guess he doesn't realize women over-analyze everything! So I'm trying not to...but my heart sank when he said it. Then, he kissed me and everything so its either OK or he was kissing me goodbye :(

I had to tell him about Eric the Viking - b/c of the stalking. I think you have to tell a guy about strange men following you around...otherwise it would be quite the shocker.

And while we were bowling, there there 6 men in the lane next to us. They were flirting with me like crazy. Cheering my strikes and hollering when I was on a 5 strike run. I am a great bowler...and that apparently impressed them. Or was it my flirty smile and shaking my behind (directed at my date only!!). I never made eye contact w/any of them...or did anything inappropriate...

But maybe one or both of these things could be the reason?


iVillage Member
Registered: 04-04-2003
Mon, 04-14-2003 - 1:07pm
If he says you have "hot chick syndrome" that means he thinks you're a "hot chick." And in my observation, 9 times out of 10 they just have to think you're a "hot chick" (e.g. eye candy) to consider you girlfriend material. It absolutely doesn't mean that's all he takes you for, though.

guess we both had good weekends, eh?

You know my guy said something interesting last night that made me go "a-HAH!!" We were out with a male friend of his having drinks and he was talking about this girl who had basically stalked him, and he was like, "well, for starters, she was overweight. I mean, I hate to admit to being shallow, but looks are a big deal to me. I need a hot, petite girlfriend."

Of course he immediately perceived that this kind of didn't sit well with me (despite the fact that i am decidedly petite and, subject to opinion, possibly hot as well). After a moment of silence he was like... "sorry... I was waiting to see if you were going to get up and leave me now."

Now, I know that he's one of those charming, confident, cute-faced though slightly pudgy guys who is spoiled because he's always dated cute thin girls, but... WHOOPS... a little alcohol in the system and out it comes in all its shallow, guy-like glory.

In a way I was relieved... relieved to hear something as typical as every guy believing he's entitled to a hot girlfriend come out of his mouth. No way do I want to be dating someone who's all nice and PC all the time, because I'm certainly not.

But whoa, come on now. I've seen your body dude, you're not all that! I'm here cuz I like you!

Wondering how I can kindly and supportively turn this into an argument that he & I should commit to a fitness program together...


iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 04-14-2003 - 1:39pm
i found this on the web...

"I've long had a theory about the existence of HCS: Hot Chick Syndrome. I formulated this after meeting my umpteenth pretty girl who, while not stupid, doesn't try to get "it". My idea is that they don't because they have never had to. There was always someone who thought the were cute and bailed them out. Normally, me."

your new guy obviously has a lot to learn about you. ;-)

Avatar for cl_shywon
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
Mon, 04-14-2003 - 2:44pm
Ahhh...I'm all warm and fuzzy for you too! That first kiss is so nice! Part of the fun is knowing that you'll probably have a second, and a third, and a fourth... The anticipation is what is fun for me.

I want to kiss my man.