we talk everyday, is he interested?

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-23-2006
we talk everyday, is he interested?
4
Wed, 01-25-2006 - 2:51am

Hello!

I have this question, and it's been bothering me in a while. Anyway, here goes:

My friend introduced me to this guy almost two months ago, and we've been chatting since then. Particularly, the for the last month or so, we've been chatting almost every single day. We're both university students (and we found out that we have the same class together), so most communication is done through that cheap medium of communication. :-p

Anyway, everyone's been telling me that the guy is definitely interested or else he wouldn't talk to me every night (he starts the conversations 90% of the time). But the thing is, he's not really making a move. And everytime I flirt with him, the response is unlike other guys (ie, he doesn't flirt back overtly). For example, last night's conversation was:

Me: I know what will make you sleep... a kiss (from me)

Him: Oh, I see... I don't think that's enough though...

Me: What? You want more??? Work for it.

Him: I always want more.

Me: And I don't give easily.

Him: Well, we've reached a minor impasse then.

So, that by far, is the most flirting he's done. I don't even know if that's considered flirting at all. You see, he's a very serious guy, and he's never had a serious relationship (he's a flingy type of guy), so I don't really know where to position myself. Also, I make little comments like, "I'll probably spend valentines alone with my bag of popcorn", and he goes, "haha, nice."

Sometimes, I wonder whether or not he's interested or maybe he's just being friendly. We've spent lunch alone a couple of times, and he always walks me to the bus stop, and he's accompanied me to this concert (since he found out I like this particular singer), but I don't really consider those as dates or whatnot, since it's all informal and we go dutch.

So, I was just wondering what your verdict on this is? Is he interested or just being friendly? And if he's interested (yes, i'm hopeful that way), what do you suggest I do?

I'd really appreciate any replies!

Thanks for your time!

Black_flats

Avatar for cl_shywon
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
Wed, 01-25-2006 - 7:45am

I don't think he's interested in dating.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-27-2004
Wed, 01-25-2006 - 7:46am
Interested in what? Sex? Maybe.
A relationship? No. It doesn't sound like it to me.
Aigh! I bet he has a girlfriend and doesn't mind flirting with you and seeing how far he can go with you.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2005
Wed, 01-25-2006 - 8:55am

**I don't think he's interested in dating. If he were, he'd as you out on a date. He may have sex with you if you intiated that (given his IM comment), but I wouldn't say he is looking for a relationship. If he's had flings in the past, that's probably what he wants. Most men in college aren't after a serious relationship, so I think given his actions it's a logical conclusion. **

I agree with this completely.

If you want a dating relationship, this is not the guy for you.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-04-2006
Fri, 01-27-2006 - 3:01am

To be completely honest, you might be pushing for something that's not there at all.

I have a friend who does the same thing, and I mean it's obviously not right that men have this tendancy to let things drag on but we can only change ourselves, right?

What I'm referring to are comments like "I'll probably just spend Valentines alone with a bag of popcorn", etc. If he's not taking those signals, assuming he's not completely retarded (which he obviously isn't if using phrases such as "a slight impasse"), then he's quite likely to not be interested in much more than:

A) Friendship
B) Sex
or
C) An easy ego boost knowing a sweet, intelligent girl is begging for his attention/time or whatever.