you aren't doing ANYTHING wrong! And it has NOTHING to do with rejecting you... I think while online dating is convenient it is NOT accurate. What I mean is... you can't show the real you... I mean I have a profile on match, yahoo, eharmony and perfectmatch (all hidden right now). But I'm VERY blunt in my ad but I use ALOT of humor too... does that come across? I don't know but the guy that is RIGHT for me will read it the way it's meant to be read and that's when I'll KNOW!
These guys can only tell so much when looking at the answers we've given on whether we work out regularly and how we eat and what turns us on and our most positive pictures we chose to post. And the same goes for them.
I've been online for almost 6 months and had TONS of guys contact me - but guess how many I've given the time of the day... 3! THREE of the probably 100+ that have contacted me! Now I did contact a handful that *I* was interested in - which seems to be drastically different than what is interested in me and I proceed to email with 2 of those and talk on the phone to one (who turned out to be PSYCHO!!!!).
I KNOW I'm picky and my standards are HIGH and while it might irritate a couple posters on here that think we need to lower our standards and who seem to understand why we are single since we are being so picky... well too bad so sad - I'm the one who has to live with the loser and I'd rather be alone then be lonely with someone who is less than what I believe I deserve. Does that mean I have a high opinion of myself - YOU BETCHA!!!!!!!!!!! I might be single but that doesn't mean I'm not worthy of the best!
Okay bottom line... don't give up - if this is the route you want to take - do it! If you are wanting to go out to meet guys (which I'm curious to hear how that route is any better)- do it! Go hang at Barnes and Noble... go down to a popular park on Sunday and read at a bench... go to church (sorry I just hear that one so much from my mom I had to throw it out there :p )... let those around you know you are single and interested in dating and ask them if they have anyone they could set you up with. CALL ME and we'll go hang at some local pub and you can try to pick up while I sit there and poo poo every guy that walks by! :p And when I do find one I want to talk to - I'm VERY opposite of you - I TOTALLY put myself out there - no old school in me!
I don't know - it IS hard - and I kinda have a guy that I bide time with so I tend to just use the online dating to find that extraordinary match that might not exist! But... don't take it as a personal reflection! You ARE pretty and very intelligent from what I see and read so -BELIEVE- girl - he's just around the corner - we just aren't sure WHICH corner! ;)
I hear ya about wondering why certain unattractive women with not that great personalities end up getting married over those that are beautiful with great personalities. I think it's because they end up settling out of fear of not finding anyone else. I've been on match.com for a couple of months now and I think I'm pretty attractive, I have a decent figure, I'm intelligent, kind caring and genuine, and accomplished in my career and I haven't had a huge response either from men. It's extremely frustrating. I have emailed or winked at probably 10 or more guys who i never heard back from. Most of the time the men that email me are not who I'm looking for or not my type looks wise. I try to go for the guys that aren't super attractive so there is not too much competition but you have to be semi-attracted to them right? It's a tough dating world out there. You guys are not alone
good - cause I have a girl that I'm suppose to meet next week (a friend of my mom's, daughter - did ya get that?) anyway... it's TOTALLY hetero ;) lol - but she's in our boat and so I'm thinking the 3 of us need to band together, get to know each other, see if we get along and then trudge out into the scary "dating" scene! ugh!
I'm gonna email you later - but I need to find out your schedule with school about to start (oh, she's a teacher too - but I don't know the grade!?) so we can plan a time to meet up and judge each other - JUST KIDDING!!!!!!!!!!! I think all 3 of us are about equal when it comes to looks, success and desperation! :p
Edited 8/11/2005 11:00 am ET ET by feelingratherlost
Oh sweetheart. I'm sorry you have felt the sting of online dating. My one edvise to you is to let go of the dream that you will meet someone "amazing" online and go out into the world. You are surrounded by countless new things to try. Please try something new and surround yourself with happy people, if you cannot surround yourself with already happy people....go out and do something nice for someone else.I don't know why, but that is always the best thing you can do to cheer yourself up.. and don't eat too much chocolate, it will make you feel fat!
I am having the same frustrations and problems with getting guys to actually take an interest in me. I am 24 and not that bad looking. Maybe they think there is something mentally wrong with me cause I don't have a full blown drivers licence
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okay here goes nothing...
you aren't doing ANYTHING wrong! And it has NOTHING to do with rejecting you... I think while online dating is convenient it is NOT accurate. What I mean is... you can't show the real you... I mean I have a profile on match, yahoo, eharmony and perfectmatch (all hidden right now). But I'm VERY blunt in my ad but I use ALOT of humor too... does that come across? I don't know but the guy that is RIGHT for me will read it the way it's meant to be read and that's when I'll KNOW!
These guys can only tell so much when looking at the answers we've given on whether we work out regularly and how we eat and what turns us on and our most positive pictures we chose to post. And the same goes for them.
I've been online for almost 6 months and had TONS of guys contact me - but guess how many I've given the time of the day... 3! THREE of the probably 100+ that have contacted me! Now I did contact a handful that *I* was interested in - which seems to be drastically different than what is interested in me and I proceed to email with 2 of those and talk on the phone to one (who turned out to be PSYCHO!!!!).
I KNOW I'm picky and my standards are HIGH and while it might irritate a couple posters on here that think we need to lower our standards and who seem to understand why we are single since we are being so picky... well too bad so sad - I'm the one who has to live with the loser and I'd rather be alone then be lonely with someone who is less than what I believe I deserve. Does that mean I have a high opinion of myself - YOU BETCHA!!!!!!!!!!! I might be single but that doesn't mean I'm not worthy of the best!
Okay bottom line... don't give up - if this is the route you want to take - do it! If you are wanting to go out to meet guys (which I'm curious to hear how that route is any better)- do it! Go hang at Barnes and Noble... go down to a popular park on Sunday and read at a bench... go to church (sorry I just hear that one so much from my mom I had to throw it out there :p )... let those around you know you are single and interested in dating and ask them if they have anyone they could set you up with. CALL ME and we'll go hang at some local pub and you can try to pick up while I sit there and poo poo every guy that walks by! :p And when I do find one I want to talk to - I'm VERY opposite of you - I TOTALLY put myself out there - no old school in me!
I don't know - it IS hard - and I kinda have a guy that I bide time with so I tend to just use the online dating to find that extraordinary match that might not exist! But... don't take it as a personal reflection! You ARE pretty and very intelligent from what I see and read so -BELIEVE- girl - he's just around the corner - we just aren't sure WHICH corner! ;)
XO
K
Kristen, I'd probably be poo-pooing those guys right along with you!
I agree- it does seem like they feel like they can get anyone just because there are so many.
good - cause I have a girl that I'm suppose to meet next week (a friend of my mom's, daughter - did ya get that?) anyway... it's TOTALLY hetero ;) lol - but she's in our boat and so I'm thinking the 3 of us need to band together, get to know each other, see if we get along and then trudge out into the scary "dating" scene! ugh!
I'm gonna email you later - but I need to find out your schedule with school about to start (oh, she's a teacher too - but I don't know the grade!?) so we can plan a time to meet up and judge each other - JUST KIDDING!!!!!!!!!!! I think all 3 of us are about equal when it comes to looks, success and desperation! :p
Edited 8/11/2005 11:00 am ET ET by feelingratherlost
"Please try something new and surround yourself with happy people"
okay... I guess we won't be hanging out then! :(
:p
I had about half a happy day today!
Edited 8/21/2005 10:42 pm ET ET by lily_skywalker
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