What is he doing? need advice

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-11-2004
What is he doing? need advice
4
Thu, 10-06-2005 - 11:14am

hi everyone, im just wondering why some men have such a problem with phoning women back, or is it just a excuse, a easy way of letting you down. I recently slept with this guy who i have known for a long time he is actually my brotherinlaws good friend, so we kinda always knew eacother. Than one night we were drinking he was pissed out of his tree and he started telling me how much he really likes me, blah, blah, all the sweet things, to get me in the sack, i fell for it cause i really thought he meant it. So than after that wild night with him, i seen him about a week later and asked what was going on with us, he said he would like to get to know me better...okay so than that night we slept together again.lol....i know, retard me.

So after that we went our seperate ways, he has not called once and were both busy working, its been a few weeks since i have talked to him. Im never home and he is always out in the field farming. When i did ask why he hasent called our last night together, he said he has been really busy and that he did try to call once, which i think is bull, cause i know for a fact he has had a few days off. I just dont know..my sister said he is probably scared cause a few years ago a girl broke his heart and he cant really trust anyone, she figures he is just being cautious, i think he is avoiding me...Should i just quit wasting my thoughts on him and move on, cause i do like him...can anyone help me out here?

thanks

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-22-2005
Thu, 10-06-2005 - 11:24am
Maybe he doesn't take a woman who is willing to sleep with him before they even exchange phone numbers seriously. I say let him go and see it for what it is a two night stand.
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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2005
Thu, 10-06-2005 - 12:45pm
Move on, even if you think you "really like him". He's not really acting like he likes you and for me, that's an important quality.
I know there's some sarcasm there but you just need to look at this as a learning experience and work on letting it go.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-13-2004
Thu, 10-06-2005 - 11:43pm
Easier said than done.........but I would not waste anymore of your time with him. He probably is scared. Scared that you are going to start pressuring him into a relationship. If some girl really broke his heart recently, than run fast. Men with trust issues are the worst to get involved with. Trust me because I have been through this with more than one man. They will think that every woman is trouble and most likely they will be commitaphobes.... Meaning they WANT to be in a relationship and do things to persue a relationship and then one day, click! It clicks in their heads that things are getting too close, too personal and they pull away. They have this push-pull behavior that will drive you nuts because you cannot figure it out because it will happen over and over again. Do yourself a favor and move on. If things slow down for him and he is over this other girl, than give it a chance at a later time. But right now, I would say he is not ready for anything serious. Good luck!!!!
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-11-2004
Fri, 10-07-2005 - 11:26am

thank you all so much i needed to hear that, i do need to move on cause im sick of wondering what he is doing, and if its always gonna be this way no thanks! and if he even even thinks of asking for another "night" he can go to you know where, lol.

thanks again =)