What is meant by "more of us than them"?

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-07-2003
What is meant by "more of us than them"?
19
Wed, 02-01-2006 - 3:49pm

Hi guys,

I've been lurking on a couple of boards for awhile and have heard the following sentiment repeatedly.

- There are more single women than single men and therefore men have the upper hand.

I've read it from both single women and men who sound misogynistic. One man actually stated that there were more married men than married women in the USA! Well then, perhaps we US-based single women should try to steal away the men married to women living outside the USA? Just kidding, but it does represent the attitude I've noticed.

I simply don't understand how this could be. Unless you live in a war torn area of the world, or in a country where female babies are killed, the number of single men and women should be about the same, right? Is it that there are fewer men than women who have a stable life and are therefore relationship eligible? I find this hard to believe, at least in the USA, where men on average make more money than women. There should be appoximately the same number of never married/no kids men as there are women as well.

Just wondering what other people thought. I haven't exactly dated extensively, but have recently been working up to making more of an effort and am trying to educate myself on the situation.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-21-2005
Thu, 02-02-2006 - 11:23am
Yup!
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-21-2005
Thu, 02-02-2006 - 11:25am

Yikes...sounds like *I* would have wanted to leave the table, too, and I AM a 20-something (late 20-something

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2004
Heeheehee - the girls and I call that the "freak magnet." The weird ones used to talk to me but they have stopped in the past couple of years. I wonder why - I haven't thought about it until now. Maybe part of it is that I am older. Maybe I have come to give off a vibe that says, "Don't talk to me, nutbag." Eh - whatever it is, I'm not complaining.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-27-2006
Stacyyyyyyy,
You make it sound like 38 is old!!!! That doesn't sound very good for me and my options!!! I prefer early 40's guys, a little older then I but not too much older, they seem to be on the same level as I am with a 3-5 year age difference in between....I guess because women mature faster then men! So they say!
Jodie
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-21-2005
No, I'm not saying that at all.
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-15-2005

I wonder how Anna Nicole felt when she got noticed by Howard Marshall?

Ya know, there are days when the paycheck doesn't quite stretch that I'm pretty sure I'd go there.

OK, I just skeeved myself out.

ROFLMAO


Avatar for cl_shywon
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003

Even ten years older is too old for me.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-19-2003

"There should be appoximately the same number of never married/no kids men as there are women as well."

While it may seem like it should be that way, statistically there is just more women then men, period. Now I dont have anything to back this up at the moment, but I thought that was common knowledge.

Also, I think there are a doxen other variables that make women outweigh men. In my own personal experience and geographic location, I find that more women want serious relationships than men. Nearly all the men I know (ages 27-32) are more focused on their career and personal goals than finding love, taking then out of serious consideration.

And I hate to bring race into this, but it is a fact that there are fewer eligible black men per black women. A great percentage of black men are incarcarated, on drugs or dealing with hard times, bringing the ratio of black men to women at around 89 to 100 (I have read articles to back this up) and 10% of black men are dating outside of their race.
Now I have no problem dating outside of my race, but I still find the options very limiting.

There are just more available women than men.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-11-2001

Now that made me feel old to think I am at the 'yuck-age' at 36, but I'll forgive everyone because when I was in my 20's I never thought I would feel as young as I do at this age. I thought 36 seemed old.

I think dating is a state of mind, finding someone is really almost a 'crap shoot'. Being open-minded is also important. Women are misfortunate that we seem to lose available men to all sorts of other reasons; jail, the military, the evil exGF who destroyed them as a person forever and then the infamous "career".

I have seen these guys and they are at evening business networking events chasing skirt. They are usually between (25 and 35) and are starting a career in real estate or financial planning. They're working, but they are also talking to the ladies. It's a great place to meet guys, and then you can tell them too you are focusing on your careers.

I also wanted to throw in that I am a 36 yr old female, and I have been dating the same guy for over a year and a half and he is 11 yrs my junior. He is very cute and good looking, and you would think he would be with the girls described in the first posts - cute, funky haircut, young, trendy clothes, high maintenance - you know the kind. But no he's with me at 36 I am more worried about making my mortgage payment than buying clothes. He said there was no conversation with the girls his age.

I guess my point is there are people out there. I never thought I would date a guy so young, and I don't think he saw himself with someone my age.

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