Who pays for the date?
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| Wed, 12-26-2007 - 12:58pm |
Hi all!
I'm sure that this has been one of those questions that has been asked many times on these message boards...here goes again...
When it comes to dating, who pays for the date? I've always believed that if a person asks another person out, then the person doing the asking should be willing to pay. This makes perfect sense...right? However, does it matter whether or not the ask-er is male of female? In other words, is it fair to assume that the guy should ALWAYS be willing to pay for the date? I've heard different opinions about this. One person thinks that men should be willing to pay for the first several dates, as it is usually the male who is courting the female. Of course, this is 2007 (soon to be 2008!!!). Does that whole courting thing apply in these days and times? I'm an old-fashioned girl, so I think it would be wonderful if a man was always willing to pay.

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>>I also appreciate if the guy pays the first few dates.
Why ?? Say after a few dates (still the evaluation period) you discover there is no 'chemistry', or 'sparks' or 'butterflies' or whatever else it's called and decide to move on. Why should the guy be stuck with the expense ? It's not the money. It's the principle. And it isn't chivalry either. Chivalry is opening the door and taking her coat, not being her expense account.
>>The view the woman is out for a "free meal" seems laughable....I can afford my own food and if I didn't like someone, going on a date just for free food would be a waste of time.
I didn't mean all but there are definitely some who do that.
>>I have met very few men who don't insist on paying the first few dates anyway.
I did too. I used to think it was the gentlemanly and chivalrous thing to do. But as Bill Maher would say, I have formed a New Rule.
Hi all!
Thanks to all who replied to my post. It's always great to get a variety of viewpoints and opinions. I agree with several of you who said that you like to be treated the first few dates...although in this day, people don't necessarily refer to it as courtship, I do think that it is still alive and well. I believe that there are some men out there who enjoy treating a woman every time they go out. Of course, it gets expensive. I would never expect a guy to go broke, taking me out every single week. However, treating on the first few dates is a "chivalrous" thing to do.
I also agree that whoever does the asking should be prepared to pay. Even if the woman asks, but the guy insists on paying, the woman should have at least gone out expecting to take care of the check because she
I agree with this. For the man to offer to pay sends me
Your story reminded me of a hilarious first date story. A friend of mine was meeting a guy at a restaurant and she was late (through no fault of her own). This was pre-cell phone days. When she got there, the guy was EATING DINNER....he had ordered without her. Plus he was really pissed off. This just kills me.
Needless to say, they never went out again.
Hi!
If I may quote Borat, "WOW WEE WAA !!" .... Please say you are blond as well.
Edited 12/28/2007 10:17 pm ET by hillaryh8er
Hi Mali2579,
This is how I approach it for the first date / meeting.
Nope...no relation to her. I am 6'4" and live near Chicago.
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Wow . . . 1 inch taller than me! Next time the
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