Woke up this morning...

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-13-2006
Woke up this morning...
11
Wed, 04-26-2006 - 1:48pm

I woke up this morning and I dont know what it is today but I just felt like giving the entire world the finger and telling it to go to hell.

I am just sick of worrying about dumb crap and whining and worrying and being the little jerk that I am. I said no to using those stupid steriods and I decided not to call that girl and I am sick of worrying about this stuff that is nothing but a waste of time. People in the world are starving, and going poor and dying of cancer or AIDS and Im sitting here saying "ohhh, I think I should use steriods because I have it so hard not being built" or "ohhh, does she like me? doesnt she like me?, what should I do?" I read my posts this morning and realize how dumb I sound.

Screw steriods, screw that girl, screw my anxiety, screw my whining insecure crap.

Ok I am done...

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-21-2005
Wed, 04-26-2006 - 2:02pm

Well, it is true there are worse things going on in the world, but stuff that's bothering you is very real to you.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-13-2006
Wed, 04-26-2006 - 4:39pm

I am just sick of things getting me so stressed and all I know is that this is stressing me out so it's best to aviod it.

And she doesnt even know me why is she going to all this trouble? We have never even talked to each other. Seems weird to me, thats all Im saying. I am not the kind of guy girls see(especially her) and have to talk to.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-14-2003
Wed, 04-26-2006 - 4:55pm

I read your profile and your posts and I see a guy who really doesn't like himself all that much. And you REALLY need to work on that.

On your profile, there are many answers that say "nothing worth noting," "nothing interesting," and so forth.

EVERYONE has something interesting about themselves. And NO ONE has a job or life that is so uninteresting that he should be embarrassed to talk about it.

For gods sake, I used to work with a hunting dog trainer. You know what my job was? I threw dead ducks around so the Labs could chase them. Now don't you think that's an embarrassing job?? But do you know how many laughs I got out of that? And, geeze, if someone didn't like me because of my *job* - they weren't worth my time. It was a job, for gods sake. Making money while I was in school. And it got me outside.

I don't see what is so incredibly horrible about your life that you have to be so ashamed and embarrassed about it and have zero self-esteem. The zero self-esteem is really not doing you any good at all.

HOW do you build self-esteem?? Well what is it about yourself that you don't like that you can change? That's the key - can you change it? Or just work towards it? Just doing that alone will help.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-21-2005
Wed, 04-26-2006 - 4:58pm

Ah...I see.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-09-2003
Wed, 04-26-2006 - 8:26pm
I dont know what you are doing on this board!
You will be single forever if you dont deal with this elf-esteem issue.
You should join the anxiety message board on thi site. I suggest you join a real life support group and I hope you meet someone there and you two support each others to get over this issue.
I know it is temporary and most of us have been through periods where we did not have enough confidence and trust in ourselves
I think the reason you have these issues can be related to childhood, maybe you have not so caring parents... but whatever the reason you should stand for yourself and take good care of yourself and be your number one priority.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Wed, 04-26-2006 - 8:32pm

At first, the idea of throwing ducks sounds cute because I missed the word "dead" and assumed that they were yellow rubber ducks.... Anyway, it is a job that someone has to do, so why should you feel bad? If someone else looks down on you, probably he or she is not very kind.

So, Anti-Sexy, what happened with your perfect-10 woman? I am sorry that I was not able to read all the posts, but I still want to know....

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2004
Thu, 04-27-2006 - 10:19am

I just read your post and you said that you looked at his profile and then I decided to look at his profile.

He lives in Chicago - where I live - one of the greatest cities to be single in.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-13-2006
Thu, 04-27-2006 - 12:13pm

Yes I have been in a relationship before. I posted about it on 'unwelcome blast..' thread. But I had an on again off again relationship with one girl for about 3 years or so. She would leave and come back and leave and come back, etc, etc. I still think about her even thought it has been 4 years since I have talked to her, I was crazy about her and still am deep down but I ignore it(most the time). I dont know why I was so nuts about her or why I cant stop thinking about her completely even after so long but I dont know a lot of things.

I fell for a girl after this and I really liked her...we went out for a while and ended up sleeping together and then the next day she cried and said she couldnt date me anymore because her boyfriend would be mad...boyfriend? I was more amused at that then anything simply because I couldnt believe I liked this girl so much and then she had a boyfriend all along, absolutely ridiculous!

There have been other girls too, some dates and all that and some bad experiences yes to answer your question.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-21-2005
Thu, 04-27-2006 - 12:15pm
Gotcha.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-13-2006
Thu, 04-27-2006 - 7:01pm
I dont know if those past relationships have shaped who I am now that much. They have added on to existing anxieties for sure but my issues have always been there even before I met these girls.

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