Women and flirting

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-13-2006
Women and flirting
75
Sun, 04-23-2006 - 10:39pm

So theres a thread on here about how a lot of you women shut down or become intensely shy when you see a guy you like or are attracted to and dont know how to act...

If I remember correctly someone wrote about how they would aviod their crush in a social setting with other people...another one said that she smiles and then doesnt do anything after that.

I am confused...

A lot of girls smile at me and a lot of girls aviod me so should I pursue those ones?
I am being sarcastic but I do have a genuine question to the females here...

How do I pick up on when a woman likes me so I can approach her or continue to talk to her or try to flirt or whatever. I would just like to know so I dont make a fool out of myself like I seem to do sometimes with women.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-27-2004
Thu, 04-27-2006 - 12:59pm
Italian men!
Oooh la la!
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-01-2005
Thu, 04-27-2006 - 1:35pm

Hallelujah! I have been waiting for you to say something positive about yourself since you started posting.

Now, say those 10 things over and over and over again until you believe them. I agree with Jules that working on your confidence issues is the only real key to attracting and keeping a healthy relationship. This list of ten things is a great step in that direction!

For Friday, go and have fun. Be funny. Talk about a lot of different things. Listen. Respect the girl. Talk about Italy. Try to get to know her as a friend. Be honest, open minded and don't work TOO hard. I like the attitude that you're looking for a new friend at this point -- that takes a lot of pressure off and will help you to just be yourself.

AJ, enjoying life with C.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-13-2006
Thu, 04-27-2006 - 7:02pm
Yeah I did say good things about myself, dont get used to it though lol. Well I am prepping myself for tomorrow night, by prepping I mean pacing around my house worrying about what I am going to do, lol.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-21-2005
Fri, 04-28-2006 - 10:08am
LOL
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-01-2005
Fri, 04-28-2006 - 12:34pm

You will be just fine. Have a great time, and enjoy getting to know the girl. She may be a "perfect 10," but she's still just a girl inside like the rest of us. Once you know her better, it will be easier.

Have fun!

AJ, enjoying life with C.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-10-2004
Sat, 04-29-2006 - 1:26am

Dude,

Hope it's all going well and that you're having fun.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-01-2005
Mon, 05-01-2006 - 12:29pm
supersexy - how did Friday go?

AJ, enjoying life with C.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-13-2006
Tue, 05-02-2006 - 2:57am

First...supersexy? Despite what many think I am not Brad Pitt, lol.

Well we got together and hung out with friends(mine and hers) at the place I saw her last weekend and it was great. I will emphasize the word IT...IT was good, it being the fact that I had an amazingly gorgeous woman talking to me the whole night...so THAT was great. She was amazing...she is eye candy yes but she is sweet and cute(the way she acts) and down to earth and loves some of the same things I do...I didnt think sexy women who loved sports existed. We talked about the NFL Draft most the night, the NFL Draft of all things, I have met girls who say they "like" sports but she knew more then me! lol go figure.

Well anyway I dont want to blab on about it too much and bore you guys but I think despite how she focused on me most the night I was too shy and quiet sometimes so I think she might think I am weird or something. Which is what I do all the time, I get so flustered I dont know what to say and come off like an awkward shy dork, like I am still 13 years old trying to talk to a girl for the first time. I dont know, maybe I overanalyze things too much.

She had to leave town the next day for a wedding and she wasnt due back untill today...she told me to call her sometime this week so we could go out for lunch or dinner whichever worked for me. Well she was supposed to get back today and I havent called her because very simply...I dont know what to say, as stupid as that sounds.

I know what the answer is- ask her out to dinner, I know but...I am not good at this stuff I mean what, or rather how do I say it? This is too long so I'll wrap this up and say I am going to call her tomorrow and ask her somehow so I hope I dont screw it up.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-01-2005
Tue, 05-02-2006 - 11:14am

Ok, let me summarize what I read:

- You spent the whole night talking to a beautiful woman
- She loves sports
- She focused on you the whole night
- She's not only beautiful but also has a great personality and some similar interests
- She wants you to call her and meet for lunch or something

I'd say she liked what she saw - regardless of if you had awkward moments. I, for one, tend to find those awkward moments endearing (especially at the beginning) because I know it's because the guy is into me. So, no worries. The girl likes you enough to want to spend more time with you. Call her - and don't worry about what to say. Just ask her to lunch. :)

Glad it went well, and thanks for the update.

AJ, enjoying life with C.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-13-2006
Wed, 05-03-2006 - 3:52am

HUGE PROBLEM

I know I am weird and stupid but I have a huge problem now that is bugging me about this girl...

I call her and ask her out to eat for tomorrow night and she asks if tonight would be good and I say of course and we go out to eat and all that and when we are leaving she runs into this guy- and I am comfortable enough with my sexuality to say this guy is very attractive...good looking, built like a rock and dressed stylishly...basically if god created an ideal man who wasnt a celebrity this guy would be close to it.

Anyway this guy says hi to her and things seem a little awkward between them and then we leave and as I drive her home I casually ask her who he was and guess what...he an ex-boyfriend.

Im not going to vent about all the things that went through my head and make you guys like me less than you already do but, needless to say it was just one more thing to remind me that I am way out of my league here. Nobody leave a fine dining establishment and goes to McDonalds and says to themselves "ahhh this is much better!"

What the hell do I do?

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