Would you date a great guy who's a TE...

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-17-2003
Would you date a great guy who's a TE...
8
Tue, 11-07-2006 - 12:20pm

Would you date a BAD KISSER?

Heck, no--a relationship's physical side is too important.
I'd talk to him about it and see if he improved.
Absolutely, because sex isn't THAT important in a relationship.
I'd just date him until a better kisser came along.

You will be able to change your vote.




Edited 11/7/2006 12:23 pm ET by gloaming2003

Angie

 

Avatar for cl_shywon
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
Tue, 11-07-2006 - 12:25pm

I don't know!

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-17-2003
Tue, 11-07-2006 - 12:35pm
I've been seeing this guy for a few months now, and he's showing signs of wanting to take our relationship to the "next level." I really like him--he's funny, sweet, good-looking, strong & sensitive, honest, has a great job, loves kids, and wants to settle down. But kissing him is like kissing the Geico lizard. 8(

Angie

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-01-2005
Tue, 11-07-2006 - 12:44pm

That's a difficult subject to broach, because ego is involved.

Have you tried SHOWING him what to do by taking the lead with your kissing?

I've dated terrible kissers before as well, and it has been a sign of bad things to come in other areas. Not that that's a universal truth, just my experience.

AJ, enjoying life with C.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-13-2004
Tue, 11-07-2006 - 12:50pm
ok, I voted I'd date him until a better kisser came along, because my answer isn't really there. I would want to see if he got better, with "practice" and I would try to coach him (subtly) about how I liked it. Then if it didn't improve, I couldn't stay. I can't stand a sloppy kisser! blak! But I wouldn't talk to him about it, that would hurt his ego, and who knows, there is prob somebody out there that LOVES the way he kisses! Just not me, so who am I to say he's not doing it "right"? It just doesn't suit me. Interesting question.

Sarahjo

"A discussion is an exchange of intelligence, an argument is an exchange of ignorance."

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-19-2003
Tue, 11-07-2006 - 1:04pm

My ex wasn't a great kisser when I first met him, but I taught him how I preferred to be kissed and he improved.

Then went on to kiss many other girls while dating me and eventually fell in love with the true love of his life. They lived happily ever after.

The end.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-17-2003
Tue, 11-07-2006 - 1:12pm
Yeah, tried many, many, many times to "lead" him to a kiss that actually involves other parts of the mouth than the tongue, but it's been completely unsuccessful. Seriously, this guy is really great. He's even taking dancing classes to make himself more attractive to women. He's the only man I've known who realizes that a lot of women like men who can dance, so by golly he's going to learn to dance! :D But my first marriage was virtually sexless, and there's no way I'm going back to a sexless relationship.

Angie

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-01-2005
Tue, 11-07-2006 - 1:36pm

Note to anyone who might be offended - some mild adult content below. :)
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The bad kisser I dated was mister tongue as well - to the point that I couldn't breathe. When we finally slept together, it was the same basic concept - I'll spare you the details. Bottom line, not good. It did improve a bit with time, but then other things went wrong in the relationship and we didn't work.

Sounds like your guy might be worth waiting out a bit, if you like everything else about him except this.

I have had some success with guys with a teasing kiss. You kiss him just long enough to get him into it, then pull away a little and go in for a very gentle lip touch or neck kiss. The stop/start thing can help get him out of that 16-year-old make-out pattern of dive and maul. :)

Maybe also try NOT kissing. if you're getting romantic on the couch or something, go for touching each others arms, hands, ears, jawline, etc. to create a more sensual, less sexual mood, to show him that you're more into slow and easy than the dive bomb method. I think men sometimes need to learn that women are more about the journey than the destination, and that he needs to find out what feels good for you along the way. The old pattern of jam his tongue down your throat, thrust his hand up your shirt and go for home is not always the answer.

Finally - I've never tried this, but it's a thought... When you're watching a movie and see a love scene, comment on how you'd like to try kissing like that - or how they look like good kissers.

AJ, enjoying life with C.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-17-2003
Tue, 11-07-2006 - 1:36pm
OMG, that's terrible!

Angie