Would your best friend do this....?
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| Thu, 03-22-2007 - 10:19am |
Here is the "meat" of the dilemma followed by some back ground info. My "best friend" and I were chatting on MSN last night, she told me about a guy she went out that she met online. She also told me about someone else she has been talking too via MSN. I asked what his email was b/c I wanted to see if I had it or spoken toi him in the past (we are on the same site) and I could give her details if I had any on the guy. SHE WOULDN'T GIVE IT TO ME.....WTF?!?!?!?!?!?! I told her she was pathetic and signed off....
My supposed best friend and I have known each other since grade 11 (Im 34, she's 33). We have had our ups and downs , periods of not talking for months. We are pretty different people. In fact. opposites. I am the extrovert, the daring one, the "wild and crazy" one, the ones who talks to everyone, doesn't judge and wear my heart on sleeve. She is the absolute opposite of all those traits.
She FINALLY got on to a dating site that I am also on. I was so happy & excited for her. She has a sister who is somewhat like me personality wise and they used to fight over guys all the time. My friend can be very territorial and be rude (intentional or not) but I guess we all can be. I am floored that she is being like this!

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In my opinion, it's her right to keep the information private. Just because you both are friends and happen to be on the same site, doesn't mean she has to share every detail with you.
Especially where dating and relationships are concerned, I think keeping some things private is a huge plus. If she happens to develop a relationship with one of these guys, it's between the two of them.
AJ, enjoying life with C.
So, next time she asks you for details, tell her no.
All she's doing is redefining her boundaries with you. It can feel odd at first when someone close to us does that, but she must have her reasons for doing so. If she's an important friend, I say respect her right to some privacy and she can respect yours when you say no as well.
It's growing pains with friends. I think it's healthy and normal for long-term friends to go through this occasionally. It's just a road bump, and you guys will get past it. :)
AJ, enjoying life with C.
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