You know what else I hate about dating..
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| Mon, 06-26-2006 - 3:51pm |
...finding a guy that will take an interest in my life.
I can usually find dates and often times find guys willing to hang out and kick it as friends, but I've noticed very, very few will actually take an interest in my life.
For instance, I want to write, specifically for the screen and theater. I also do poetry and short stories. But when I tell guys this, they rarely ask to see work or comment on the work I have published online.
I'm also finishing a master's, learning to cook, want to try all sorts of dancing including salsa and ballroom dancing, I'd love to travel and read and I get into philosophical discussions on race relations, social issues, spirituality and personal growth. But seriously, besides the first date pleasantries, I find no one has really tried to explore my interests. Or they stop asking questions. When I am seeing someone, I want to know all about them. But I never get anyone that really wants to know about me. Half the time, they don't even remember what I do, nor do they seem to care.
Ok, going back to work. End of vent of the day.

Well, when guys truly take interest in you and not sex, they will want to know you. I am actually suprised guys don't do that when on a date, how else are they going to know if they want to keep dating you. I don't get it, I really don't. Every girl that I meet, they never seem to be interested in spirituality which is big part of my life.
I feel like I'm alays the one trying to get the info.
I have a friend who has his Master's in English and has been published online and in magazines. He has written short stories and poems, just like yourself, sorry he's taken though, just kidding.
See, I find they do ask a lot of questions on the first date, but it usually ends there.
The one guy Ive been kinda seeing is a musician and a music producer with a local label. When I told him about an agent who has expressed an interest in signing me and doing production work together, he wished me well and said congrats but hasn't asked me a thing since.
(sigh) I guess that just proves this guy is yet another one that isn't that into me. And really none of them are.
Ok, that is enough pouting. I'm a big girl.
I find it hard sometimes to remember who to ask about what, but if I'm dating someone I try and make a point to remember what's going on in their life.
Argh, yes! I agree with you. That happened with the last guy I dated. I was really excited about a freelance writing project I landed, and was telling him about it. He glazed over and didn't say anything. Nothing. It's not like I went on forever -- my little story was maybe three minutes and he couldn't even muster a "hey, good for you."
Mind you, this was after I had asked him about his big business deal that was brewing -- and after I showed appropriate interest in his life. I suppose that's a big red flag for the future -- it shows that the guy couldn't care less about me. He doesn't have to hang on my every word, or be excited about everything I'm excited about, but he could at least show a cursory interest in what's important to me.
Thanks for letting me share your venting space. :)
AJ, enjoying life with C.
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Yes, I think that is really bad. It was probably not just that he felt no interest in your life, but he may have felt competitive. This kind of attitude is really sad. Although, on first dates, it usually irritates me if people ask too many questions about my professional activities. When I have to talk about it too much, I almost don't feel that it is a date any more. So sometimes I am really happy if I can talk about something else for a change.
Edited 6/27/2006 9:58 am ET by pimbiroo
Edited 6/27/2006 9:59 am ET by pimbiroo