Is your mom dying to marry you off?

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-20-2006
Is your mom dying to marry you off?
Fri, 08-25-2006 - 10:08am

Does your mother (or step-mother) nag you about being single? Is she constantly giving you unsolicited advice ("you're to picky...")? If so, we'd like to interview you for a book we’re writing on how to resolve the tensions between young (20 to 40-something) women and their mothers.

Our names are Julie Halpert and Debby Carr. Julie is a freelancer for publications like
Newsweek, National Public Radio and The New York Times. Debby Carr is a sociology professor at University of Wisconsin-Madison and Rutgers University. Our book – to be published by St. Martins’ Press - focuses on how mothers of a generation ago often have difficulty understanding their daughters' personal and professional choices. We'll have qualified therapists weigh in on some of the disputes.

We have two requests in this posting. First, we want to start each chapter with a
question or phrase that you’re just tired of hearing your mom say. Some examples might be: “You're having take-out again?” or “What was wrong with your blind date? You’re just too picky.” The questions can pertain to any issue you find important - your standards of cleaning, the number of children you have, how you spend money, discipline, dating, your work choices, religion, politics, sexual orientation, or your relationship with your spouse. Feel free to email them along!

Second, we’re looking for women to interview for our book. Our book focuses on
women whose own mothers may have some difficulty understanding their daughters’ lifestyle and choices. We believe this lack of understanding may come from the totally different, traditional lives that mothers of a generation ago often led. Even if your own mother worked, you may find that she comes from a different planet, of sorts. Ideally, we'd like to speak with both you and your mother. We’re specifically
interested in talking with both generations about issues where there might be disagreement, like child discipline, dating, how you spend your money, and the like.

So if you fit in either of those categories and would like to speak with us, please e-mail Debby Carr (carr@ssc.wisc.edu) or Julie Halpert (jhalps@comcast.net). Please include your cell, work and home phone numbers, and the most convenient time to reach you. Also, please let us know your name, age, occupation, number of children and
where you live, and a bit about your relationship with your mom. If you don’t want to participate but know someone who may want to, please forward along this message to them.

We promise to keep your information absolutely confidential. We will use
pseudonyms in our book to protect your privacy and will conduct the mother and daughter interviews separate from one another if you prefer. Thank you for your input!
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