Zero attachment, zero anxiety
Find a Conversation
| Wed, 11-23-2011 - 8:23am |
Saw this wonderful piece from Martha Beck:
http://marthabeck.com/2011/08/zero-attachment-zero-anxiety-insight-from-martha/
Excerpt:
When the temperature of a day reaches the dew point, the moisture in the air, which is invisible to the eye, suddenly appears everywhere. It was always there; it just needed a certain temperature to become visible. Similarly, everything we need to make us happy is waiting for the “temperature” of our inner life to create the dew point where it can become material form. The dew point temperature of all your desires is a feeling of normalcy. It is not high excitement, nor grasping, nor yearning. All of those emotions contain anxiety and attachment — try them right now, you’ll see.
To give you an example of what this feels like, think about the feeling you have watching a beautiful sunrise. You may experience awe and intense gratitude, but you will not be thunderstruck, amazed or hysterical. A sunrise is glorious, but it is normal. We aren’t attached to the sun continuing to shine because we are sure it will.
- Acceptance and Letting Go... 3
- The Satisfaction of Friendships 14
- New here and ending a fwb 4
- Changes (long) 10
- OT - I am beside myself 3
- Should I contact him or not? 30
- why I am still single 3
- How to enjoy the rest of your life 11
- Message board mechanics: is this as good as it gets? 11
- Everything is Played Out 11
Memeber Support
| Q: | Where can I change my password? |
| A: | Log in, go to Edit My Preferences, and click the Account tab. Make and save your changes. |
Pages
In regards to my work: I was laid off in 2003. Of course I was freaked out, but even then I knew that people would help me. And it's not even like I'm this super-connected person--but I got a lot of help in unexpected ways. And I'm not the woo-woo type, either. I've often thought of this and why it doesn't translate to my lack of success with men, but I think it warrants exploration.
You sound like you have your head screwed on pretty straight when it comes to dating. Keep up the good work.
I can say that I've successfully made the transition to detachment. I'm not quite sure how to describe it in words just yet, but will post once I do!
Have a wonderful Thanksgiving everyone!
When it comes to self-improvement/pop psych/relationship adivice books, I think you have to really separate the wheat from the chaff. I agree: it seems so many people try something to meet a man, it happens to work for them, so they write a book thinking everyone could do it the same way.
I actually kind of got the power of now when I read it ten times.. and I try so hard to practice that theory everyday of my life. Of course I fall short but then when my friends are like rats in a maze and worrying about everything I try and tell them let things go because you cant control everything.
I will be write back to post more .. Have a p h one call
I guess its pretty common sense stuff when you really look at it.. We have actually talked about this stuff here alot on the boards.
We always say just live your life no matter if you meet a man or find a job or whatever and cant look at the outcome of it.
I'm not saying it NEVER is.
What I mean by that is I want to find meaning in my life that's not so tied up with having a partner. I want to look at the bigger picture. And of course I still want a man in my life, and he would be part of this bigger picture. But I want to have meaning and connection my life whether there's a man in it or not. I feel like I've been trying to do this anyway, but I feel like right now I want to dig deeper into how to really accomplish this.
It makes sense, however, if you are living in the now, would you have a compass focused on the future?
You are definitely heading in the right direction by doing the "inner" digging. That's the peeling process I was referring to. It may be a little fuzzy now, but it will get clearer and clearer as you dispose of the layers. Each one represents something within you - that is blocking you from living in the now in your personal life - that needs to be healed. Figuring out what those blocks are and truly seeing them, enabes you to release them.
Pages