10 Online Dating Mistakes Women Make
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10 Online Dating Mistakes Women Make
| Fri, 08-24-2007 - 12:35am |
This article popped up on the Yahoo home page and I thought it was interesting...
~s~
10 Classic Online Dating Mistakes That Women Make
By Evan Marc Katz Special to Yahoo! Personals Updated: Aug 23, 2007


Those are really good and really original tips, Soonee. I feel the author conveys the REALITY of online dating really well. I wish I got to read those 5 years ago before I started dating online so I would understand what to have for my expectations - like why doesn't he call, and what about the competition and stuff like that. Assumptions are what get us in trouble for sure.
The only one that gives sort of a little disagreement to me is this one:
Mistake #5: Meeting for a Coffee Date to Save Time
Because I feel that after reading so many profiles and understanding the issues of the men in my age pool and deciphering their initial emails and the phone call that I can really say go or no go for a meeting with accuracy. And I want the meeting to be quick and simple. I can do a really good narrowing process so I only have one or two dates for the week. I never had five dates in any one week. OMG. That would tire me so!!
I find that too much email in the beginning makes you go too fast too quick or it sets you up for disappointment if you don't like each other in person. I feel that you have to look at their profile to see if they are a basic match on paper (proximity, religion, height, smoker, interests, wants kids, has kids, wants someone with kids and all that good stuff) and then you see how nice their email is and how they want to accommodate you with what to do at first - this is a big big biggee in my book. And then you just have a basic phone call or two to see if you like their voice or if any more really big flags come out. I find if they have a big issue they like to talk about it. Like getting out of their 3rd divorce or something.
THEN I would have a quick meeting which could be coffee, breakfast or lunch or an early dinner or even happy hour. I sure as heck don't want to sit through a 3 hour dinner with someone I don't like. A quick chat to see them in person and then plan for another date if you both want is best. It is just easier on the nerves. Look great and make a good first impression. Don't make it draining.
BUT the irony is that my first date with the Lifeguard was NOT coffee. It was a game of pool. Something I would not usually do - but was not opposed to doing because as he suggested it is something he can teach me and it is doing something and chatting to keep us both comfortable. And it was a place where we had both gone with our kids so I knew there were lots of fun things to do that I liked there. And he was a GREAT teacher. And I had fun and did good at it. And that is one of the reasons we hit it off. Hmmm. So maybe you want to keep it short and fun but have something engaging?
I was just thinking that rlch's wine tasting is also a great first date - as long as you don't taste too many wines, especially if you are a light-weight like me! LOL!! But it gives you something to do that is fun for both.
So maybe her point to avoid the speed dating process of coffee is a good one. But maybe it needs to be fine-tuned to say you should do something fun for both people to ease the nerves and encourage the chemistry.
I agree about meeting for coffee, Judy.
All in all, I liked the article but there was one section I really disagreed with - the part about 'Everyone lies'.