is anyone else wondering...

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-22-2006
is anyone else wondering...
29
Sun, 01-25-2009 - 9:31am
when this ring is going to land on my finger?
It comes up in some part of conversation either in regards to engagement or marriage or whatever every day but still the ring is stashed somewhere in the house.
granted I was annoyed he forgot to do the dishes again and am feeling under the gun for a concert I have been sick preparing for but I cant help but think a little bling would go a long way here.
I know I am sounding like a needy girl but I just want it to happen. Plus I am headed into the week my mom died and I get so moody and haunted - I know his orginal plan was to eclipse one of our bad anniversaries ( like her death anniversary - this will be ten years this year.) but now I wonder if that is such a good idea. I picture myself all sloth like looking like hell, pressed for time to practice and him squeezing an earnest proposal in there? I wanted to look ravishing and be dewy eyed and happy all over. As I write that I know if I tell him this he will put off the engagement even longer. I guess I just really need the validation and reassurance the ring represents - that we are in this together for the long haul and ready to shout it from the rooftops now. Maybe I am just having a bad day but it is not even 9:30AM.
I also should mention that it does NOT help that he told my family about the ring. They all look like they are elves now waiting for their keebler cookies.
Ugh.
Lilypie - Personal picture

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-28-2004
Sun, 01-25-2009 - 9:47am

I'm wondering!!!!

Time's been a little precious for me lately, but I've been wondering all week if it was on your finger. Bless your heart!!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-05-2008
Sun, 01-25-2009 - 1:17pm

Thanks for the laugh.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-30-2008
Sun, 01-25-2009 - 2:46pm

The only thing I can lend is he's a man and I do not even pretend to understand how they work or what they are thinking City. But I'm sure in his mind he's got a great plan of action to propose to you...and to him a couple days (or, gulp, weeks) doesn't matter...he wants to play it out as he sees fit. I know, I'm not much help...but unfortunately you're at his (cute) mercy! Patience is not a virtue I excel at, so I feel for you. Try to hang in there and many positive vibes as you near some of the sad anniversaries. I lost my father 5 years ago and each year at that time it's difficult.


~C

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-06-2008
Sun, 01-25-2009 - 9:13pm
Maybe one of your family members can sort of press him, and without divulging anything specific at least warn you a bit!
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-06-2008
Sun, 01-25-2009 - 9:23pm
Forgive me, but need a bit of history here.....I'm trying to remember without going back in the posts- Were you supposed to know the ring had been bought and arrived? Let's see- How can I boost you up? hmmmmm- A watched pot never boils......A watched ring loses it's BLING.....Good things happen to whose who wait...... In this case it must be going to be GOOD, VERY VERY GOOD!
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-22-2006
Sun, 01-25-2009 - 9:36pm
He knows I know it is here and he wasnt trying to keep the arrival a secret I dont think. We live here together and it was delivered to the house and I signed for it!!! He is playing a cat and mouse game with it and I think he has a plan. I am just feeling like I want to be wearing it now and am wondering what he has up his sleeve. I kind of wish I didnt know it was here and I also wish my family didnt know because they keep asking questions and look all excited and smiley. It is distracting to be on pins and needles all the time not knowing when it is coming. I suppose you are right that I sholud just not watch the pot as you say but whenever I stop thinking about it a family member calls or he asks me something about the engagement. He wants to plan a party and we talked the other night about where we would like to get married. but the ring isnt on my finger. The only thing that makes sense at this point is that he has something very specific planned and needs me to be patient. Not one of my strong suits and I am having a rough time emotionally with the sad anniversaries around my mom's ten year death anniversary so I guess my tolerance for cat and mouse is down a bit. Normally I am a GREAT mouse so I can see how he might not expect that I am feeling more RATTY then mousy.
That's pretty much the history. :)
Lilypie - Personal picture
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-22-2006
Sun, 01-25-2009 - 9:44pm
Thanks for your post. I really do get the blues around this time. You would think they would get better after ten years but you know what? They havent! I still miss her so much and I spent 5 years helping her fight the cancer that took her. it just brings back such raw memories of the days when I knew we were finally losing that battle. I do hope in some ways he proposes sooner rather than later. End of Jan and beginning of Feb are always in a haze over here and to have something good to celebrate each year would be nice I think for us.
I am trying to be patient of course and I know youa re right that he has something planned. He mentioned something about if I had a spa I preferred today. I was like "huh?" He must think all ladies have secret spas they go to. We have been together for almost three years and I have never ever said to him " Bye hon, Im off to the SPA" but maybe this is part of my perfect proposal? If so, yeehaw seriously. I would love a spa day and you know what? I have never even had one so I am not even sure what it entails!lol I must be super tense then right?
I have such a busy week ahead. It will help distract me....
Lilypie - Personal picture
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-22-2006
Sun, 01-25-2009 - 9:50pm
Hey trust me I am trying to not look sloth like or like he!! but I was pretty sick for three days last week and NOBODY I mean nobody would have thought of proposing to me. So I guess even though the ring has been here for 9 days, I have to subtract 3 for being so out of it I might not have remembered had he popped the question. I had quite a fever with the flu I caught. I am better now though and I am trying to just stay patient but AWARE, you know? I put in the other post, it is clear he is planning something and he is asking weird questions to put it all together. It WOULD look pretty with my gown you are RIGHT! And that many little diamonds under the light could really be beautiful , right?LOL I might just mention that to him.
And the other thing - I almost forgot to post this. My son came and told me that SYB asked him for his permission to marry me! My heart stopped when he told me and he looked so uncharacteristically bashful telling me. I was chopping veggies for dinner and almost hurt myself. I asked him what he said and he said " I told him of course he could" So cute. He gave me a hug for a little longer than usual. :)
Lilypie - Personal picture
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-06-2008
Sun, 01-25-2009 - 10:25pm
That gives me the idea it will be something wonderful! And that he asked your son if He could marry you is awesome. In a year you'll laugh about all the suspense attached to the receiving of the ring! I have to agree with you that I wouldn't want it to be on the anniversary of something sad. I lost my Dad 2 years ago Feb and when the date gets near I find that he's on my mind and it's a sad time for me. Losing my MOM would be worse. I can understand that something happy wouldn't necessarily erase the sad memories.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-25-2007
Sun, 01-25-2009 - 10:31pm

My son came and told me that SYB asked him for his permission to marry me! My heart stopped when he told me and he looked so uncharacteristically bashful telling me.


Not that you are questioning it but THAT is a sign of a GOOD CATCH - for sure!

mom_uk2socal - Mom to DS22, DS19, DD16

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