Are any other DADS like this?

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-17-2004
Are any other DADS like this?
3
Tue, 09-12-2006 - 6:01pm
My childrens father was supposed to take the kids for the weekend..he works midnights..so the agreement is friday at noon till Sunday around dinnertime..well his FIRST weekend with the kids he had to bring them a day early because he had a golf tournament with work.
Photobucket
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-17-2003
Tue, 09-12-2006 - 8:25pm

Hello and welcome to the board! Until you sit down with your attorney and work out the custody/visitation arrangements you are pretty much on your own. If you are lucky enough to discuss your concerns with your STBX, then maybe you can work out something.

One thing I learned the hard way is that your court orders may end up being your best friend if your ex is difficult and/or selfish. I was married for 21 years and I have been divorced for 4. There are so many things I wish I had known. ONE of my biggest mistakes was assuming we would be able to work together and I really put myself at a huge disadvantage with my original divorce decree. I was trying to be "nice" and not make waves. It cost me alot of heartache and money to get it straightened out 3 years later.

The second biggest mistake I made was going online and dating only 5 months after my divorce. The ladies here have lots of experience and good advice. Dating as a Single Parent is also an excellent board.

I look forward to reading your posts and I hope you stick around!
Stephanie

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-07-2005
Wed, 09-13-2006 - 12:04am

Hi Shannon,


Welcome to the board.


Photobucket
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-16-2006
Sun, 09-17-2006 - 7:32pm
Yes, I have been (and still sometimes am) there. Do not ever tell the kids he is coming, have it always be a surprise. If he stops by, don't tell them he is "planning" on coming back. Don't ever let the kids see you react (this is a really hard one....) Very simply ask him to just not tell the kids anything......this also lets hime off the hook, whether he deserves it or not. Make it easy for him to walk away, don't fight him. The kids will figure him out in their own time- we seriously underestimate how much our kids know about their "dads."