Bad Babysitter?
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| Sun, 04-06-2008 - 5:02pm |
Ok so as many of you know I'm currently going to school for medical assisting and working part time to support myself and my son. School is 9 -1 and work is 2 - 10 (sometimes 6 or 8 also). My best friend since elementary school is a stay at home mother with 2 boys of her own (Ben is 2 and Mike will be 4 in June) and she watches Kurt for me (he'll be 4 in July) during the week and on Saturdays if I need her to. She is only charging me $50 a week and she lets me crash at her house if I want to since I live so far from school and work and she is much closer. (her husband is a trucker and is only home on weekends so it works out well for both of us because she dislikes being alone all week anyways, especially at night.) She has been watching K for me since January. Here is my question:
About 7 - 8 weeks ago Kurt was going to go to the bathroom. When he turned around to walk down the hall he tripped on his own feet and fell face first into an end table and cut his cheek. It was a small cut (about an inch to two inches) and he got 2 stitches. Kim called me right away and met me at the urgent care so I could get him taken care of. On Friday her son Ben was having what I call a mean day and threw a picture frame and it hit Kurt on the back of the head and split the skin (again very small, 1 -2 inches). He got 3 staples to close it up because it was in the hairline and they don't like to do stitches in hair. Now my ex husband is saying that Kim is a bad sitter and he doesn't want K over there anymore. There is no way I can afford to put him in daycare from 8am to 10:30 pm 5 days a week, and I don't want to stick him with strangers when he's known Kim his whole life. What should I do?? Do you guys think she is a bad sitter?
For the record, Ben was punished for throwing the frame and Kim called me at work and again met me at the urgent care. She has apologized profusely both times and I know she genuinly feels awful that K got hurt. She doesn't spank or hit for any reason and his punishments with her are consistent to the punishment I give him. She is also very fair and all 3 boys recieve the same amount of love, treats and punishments.



My gut tells me that he is fine with her. She is a great mother, attentive to her kids and she does teach Ben right from wrong, but he is only 2 and he does get picked on the by older boys (mine and hers) which she has also attempted to put a stop to. But my ex husband feels that our son should't go there anymore. I just wondered if anyone here thought he had a valid point or do you think he's being unreasonable?
I think she sounds okay from what you write - I like that she doesn't spank or hit. And the kid who threw the frame was only 2. Accidents to happen and from what you say she handled everything right.
It does sound though, like maybe she could do a better job with childproofing - not have tables with sharp corners and have things like picture frames out of reach - maybe you can offer to help her with that?
May I chime in even if I am new?
I say to go with your gut- you know your friend best, and both situations sound like accidents that would happen anywhere!
Its tought when you question a sitter - & even worse when an X, who offers NO solutions, questoins them!
Sounds like she is good, & its been a couple unfortunate accidents. Hope all goes smoothly from here on out!
Rebecca, Mom to Averey, 2/8/00, Kibo, Sana & Zuri too!
The table isn't really sharp per say, it's wooden. He just happened to hit a soft part of his face (cheek).
Thanks for all the feedback so far. I know that I'm right and my ex is an idiot, but it still feels nice to hear some reassurance from you ladies.
Accidents happen, no matter who the kids are with.
not that I wud have recognised it then but my ex did same thing - undermined any time he could:-
mom_uk2socal - Mom to DS22, DS19, DD16