I'm so sorry to hear about your (hopefully not permanent) breakup. I think you did a great thing going out. I probably wouldn't have had the guts. I've been steering clear of social settings and stuff lately. Just enjoying the house and looking forward to the kids. Definitely NOT into any kind of relationship right now. I had a sort of break up with someone a month ago (can't believe it's already been that long). Time seems to stop when I'm in a R but not when I get out. Weird. Anyway, I did get away last weekend to clear my head and as you read, got licked. Made it clear WAY upfront I wasn't looking. The thing with the last guy seemed to take a little more of a toll then I thought, because I kept thinking I spotted him on the beach, only to notice it wasn't him. Kind of a heart stopper and then it made me sad. And it didn't even last long, so I cannot even relate how you are feeling right now, but just know we are here for you girlie! I was off the board for months and dating stopped for awhile, until I met that guy. Now I've been back on about a month after my breakup. I just feel after so many years on the board, it's a great therapy.
What I meant for my term entertainment - meaning something to do from boredom or just because we want validation or someone to fill a loneliness gap - I believe we should have a very good social life of many friends and activities and not date in place of that - in my mind that is the lazy way out. Of course we don't want to just be entertainment as in booty call either - good point from you that I did not think of.
My reasoning is because we are all moms and have a lot at stake. I believe that time spent with MrWrong takes away from being MsRight and finding MrRight and that it can bring many serious problems to our lives. That we need to be more serious about what we have to have in a partner and we stick to that and shoot high for our goals. I believe we have to love ourselves enough to want the very best for us and our kids.
Getting mixed up with the wrong person can make us develop emotions and sexual relationships that make us stay way too long and make bad decisions in our lives that profoundly influence us and our children.
In other words, my opinion, is to really get yourself to a place where you can attract a very good man - and don't settle on a bad man.
I think it is okay to date casually to get to know someone - that is a good thing - to shop. But I think a relationship should be with someone who is very very good.
"Oh and I see nothing wrong with a little booty call entertainment ;o)... Wish I had Rebecca's LB..."
That of course is a personal decision - for me there is no way an FWB would work because I always get emotionally attached with sex and then end up wanting more than the person can give. I also believe that if you really want sex you are going to be more motivated to get out and meet more people and be your best to meet the right guy - every minute spent with the FWB could be spent on an activity that helps you meet someone. Plus I would not want to meet someone who has a FWB while he is dating me so I offer that in return. Just my .02..... I want to get what I give and visa versa.
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Hi, Cat.
What I meant for my term entertainment - meaning something to do from boredom or just because we want validation or someone to fill a loneliness gap - I believe we should have a very good social life of many friends and activities and not date in place of that - in my mind that is the lazy way out. Of course we don't want to just be entertainment as in booty call either - good point from you that I did not think of.
My reasoning is because we are all moms and have a lot at stake. I believe that time spent with MrWrong takes away from being MsRight and finding MrRight and that it can bring many serious problems to our lives. That we need to be more serious about what we have to have in a partner and we stick to that and shoot high for our goals. I believe we have to love ourselves enough to want the very best for us and our kids.
Getting mixed up with the wrong person can make us develop emotions and sexual relationships that make us stay way too long and make bad decisions in our lives that profoundly influence us and our children.
In other words, my opinion, is to really get yourself to a place where you can attract a very good man - and don't settle on a bad man.
I think it is okay to date casually to get to know someone - that is a good thing - to shop. But I think a relationship should be with someone who is very very good.
Those are some very good points, Judy.
"Oh and I see nothing wrong with a little booty call entertainment ;o)... Wish I had Rebecca's LB..."
That of course is a personal decision - for me there is no way an FWB would work because I always get emotionally attached with sex and then end up wanting more than the person can give. I also believe that if you really want sex you are going to be more motivated to get out and meet more people and be your best to meet the right guy - every minute spent with the FWB could be spent on an activity that helps you meet someone. Plus I would not want to meet someone who has a FWB while he is dating me so I offer that in return. Just my .02..... I want to get what I give and visa versa.
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