Can I pick your brains ladies?
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| Mon, 03-03-2008 - 8:58am |
Ok, In an effort to better see how I am viewed by the oppossite sex, I am wanting your honest opinions on these situations/questions.
I have been told these past statements in the past year when trying OLD (which to this moment is effective in weeding out different ideals of what I want, but has not been very effective).
Background - I have been divorced since 2006, my son is 2 years old. I am 31 years old. I have self esteem issues and I am working on these on a daily basis. My question is to better make myself a whole person BEFORE I try to date again I want to ask the ladies on this board for help!
Situation/Question #1 - I have been told that I seek the bad/negative out in every situation - this from men that when I point out that I am not being treated very nicely or that they are playing games - I get the old you are being negative. How is a proactive way for me to deal with these type of situations? I am just talking to the people at this point/went out for 1-2 dates. Pretty much one man in particular, he wants to date but will never make the first move...I say he is playing games and he gets defensive and says I am being negative! WTH! Don't get it, I don't have time for games with people. I just figure I have a life and if he is not "grown up" enough to ask me out, this is stupid!
Sorry for my rambling...just don't get it! Confusing situation that I have to pull myself away from!
Christy
Mommy to ds 2 yrs old (weird to not say xx months old!)

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How do I meet "decent" people?
I believe that an indicator of my spiritual health are the people I attract in my life (romantic or otherwise). I use to attract angry women and I realized that was my Mother stuff who was this angry woman who resented men because of her father. From my research/readings, women with distant fathers have an unconscious resentment toward their fathers. Not always the case but the ones I have had relationships with had that.
I worked on myself in releasing my unconscious anger and worked on being positive. I sent apology notes to the women who ended our relationships in anger toward me (including my former spouse). I have done (and are doing) spiritual work. I have done processes that worked on my unconscious (ex. hypnosis among other things).
I now have people in my life who are positive as well. Anyone who comes into my life who is not that then I let go and don't associate with them. I am lucky to work in a place that focuses on the same values and I attribute my landing a job there because of the personal work I have done on myself.
Mark
We're fools whether we dance or not, so we might as well dance. ~Japanese Proverb
Thank you for letting me know someone is out there. I am really down right now. That guy that I was posting about - he only gives me very vague answers and I can't live with that. I wear my heart on my sleeve and I really can't have him rip it to shreds!
Thanks again, I am going to be do cry myself to sleep!
Christy
mommy to ds 2years old.
Take care of yourself Christy. It sounds that you need some nurturing right now in your life and probably this is not the best time to look for a guy to date.
Hugs and it may help to focus and list the good things in your life.
Mark
We're fools whether we dance or not, so we might as well dance. ~Japanese Proverb
Christy--
I feel the same way!
April
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