Can we talk chore lists everyone?
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| Tue, 02-26-2008 - 3:08pm |
OK Alison's thingie got me thinking.
I frequently need to catch up on what I think or thought my DS is capable of doing to help out around the house. I found out yesterday that he can do laundry!!! I had kind of a brief epiphany like "wow I need to catch up with what he is capable of and make my life a little easier"
I mean, for some of us, we arent single moms to toddlers anymore and we are possibly driving ourselves CRAZY trying to get it all done.
SOOOOO - Can everyone list the ages of their children again and what they do as chores. I think we might all get some ideas and have a bit more time to read or just be us instead of running around like crazy cleaning ladies.
Here's mine
DS - 9 years old
He can:
vacuum
dust
do laundry
simple dishes ( still not comfortable with him doing knives - hello!)
groom the dog
sweep
mop
clean his room
strip sheets in the house for laundry
collect and take out trash
make school lunch ( I have a shelf dedicated to school lunch stuff)
make breakfast (simple)
Why cant I find more time for me with all of the stuff he can help with? Honestly it helped for me to write all of that out! I need to set chore schedule around here PRONTO!



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Anyhow, she and her older brother who is 18 both get 100 at the first of every month automatically deposited in what is their own bank account with a bank card they carry. They are then responsible for buying ALL of their clothing and meals and activities with friends, gifts etc. The mother is awesome IMO and she says it has saved them a lot of heartache. Her daughter always looks well put together but isnt overly into trends. She is a beautiful girl but simple in her approach on things and I think the fact that she has to pay for things herself has really helped her see things differently than her friends.
I am really thinking of doing this with my son when he is ready. I guess there is always the chance they will go into overdraft but I would imagine these parents take that money back from them.
What do you guys think of this?
Also, btw, I have tried giving DS an allowance but he didnt really seem to care about the money so we stopped. He just doesnt have occasion to buy things yet on his own much I think and we really do take care of clothes and stuff.
Great thread!
My DD's 6 and 4 don't really have to do very much around the house but this year they both have started picking out their clothes, and following through on their morning routines without my help.
I started this thing when my DS was 6 where I put cubbies that hang from ikea in his closet and each cubby had a days clothes, socks and underwear included. I still remember what he said the first day we used it He said "This has resolutionized my morning" So cute - it really was difficult back then getting him together in the morning and I was sick of looking for clothes or an outfit and the truth was he didnt care what outfit so this worked for us and still does even now. Just this year he has started caring more about what he wears and has a few favs that he wants more than the others but still the cubbies work! I just fill them up when he is gone on Sat or Sun for the week ahead.
Since he hit second grade I put a shelf together for lunch supplies and a drawer in the frig for the same reason and he does make his own lunch. And since he loves waffles, he can fix those or an English muffin for breakfast.
I should mention that at his school if we are late in the morning, we get warnings and eventually you can get expelled for this because it effects their funding if too many kids are tardy. So these morning things are super important and he knows it so that helps us!
I am going to apply your approach - I just have never been as clear as you have and it is GREAT advice....thanks!
I am going to try the timer thing after my concerts are over this week and I will let you know how it goes. We have a message board near my front door so I am going to use that to mark what can be done during the cleaning sprint:)
GREAT POST:
16.5 DS - load dishwasher and run when needed
mom_uk2socal - Mom to DS22, DS19, DD16
OMG!
Thanks!
When I was sick a few weeks ago, I lost my patience with my son because I had asked him to help out in his room a bit and get the clothes put away and he said he did but then when I came in the next morning I found out he had fibbed. I told him he needed to be more thoughtful and that the fib was especially hurtful since he knew I was sick and couldnt do things that week and I expected more from him. Honestly, he got it and has been way more thoughtful about just about everything since. I mean, normally I am up and about doing things in the house and the multitask queen but when we are sick we need the other people in the house to step it up a bit. It is something they will have to do when they are older if they live with other people too. It is common sense to us of course but it is also common courtesy. So I would have a talk with your kids about that and give them a list of things that they need to do to help keep things up and running while youa re getting better. No tv no internet no playing until at least half of the list gets done and done well since they are old enough to do it right. Others might have a different idea of course, but that would be what I would do!! I know you must have been at your wits end to find things in a bad state in your house this morning when youa re already struggling!!
OK it is really interesting to see how everyone has different chores or expectations for their kids. And to a certain extent I feel guilty asking mine to do too much because " kids need to be kids" But what about the idea that we are training them to be good partners some day or just plain self sufficient. I wouldnt have had money for a cleaning lady when I was younger. I could do it now but I just havent gotten there yet and with bf here I think we can manage and might like the money for something else.
I guess what I am thinking about today as I read your posts is - When I left to study in Paris I was a brilliant young violinist, totally ready in that regard:) BUT I couldnt do laundry, didnt know how to cook, had never really had to clean anything except picking up my clothes, couldnt hem a pant, the list goes on. My parents always let me off the hook because I was so busy with competitions and practicing and lessons. I was grateful at the time but it was frustrating then to have no life skills and I felt pressure getting used to my new environment new language new people and then on top of it asking someone how to do load the laundry? Ech.
Shouldnt we be having them do some of the basics at least once a week to make sure they will know how eventually? My kid mainly just does his room and puts his clothes in the hamper. But I know he can do more because he had to when I was sick. That's how I found out he was capable. I do want him to have time to play and be little and he already has a lot of homework and activities so there is time spent there.
Arent we all annoyed when we meet or date someone who eventually shows us that mommy did everything for them and then mommy somehow morphs into US? Yikes!! I dont want my son's future gf or wife giving me dirty looks!! And if he lives on his own I want to know that he is able to handle things well and keep his life running efficiently so he can concentrate on whatever his dreams are.
So where is the balance?
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