Candid Question. Sort of embarrassing...

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-28-2008
Candid Question. Sort of embarrassing...
25
Mon, 09-15-2008 - 2:21pm

Slightly R rated...just to warn you.


But if I can't ask here, where CAN I ask, right?


Here's the issue. I wonder if you all can relate

pacificsun2-1.jpg picture by samsigs
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-28-2008
Tue, 09-16-2008 - 11:45am

Thank you so much for that response, Alma. I appreciate your honesty and that you have been able to relate. It's happened only maybe three times, but Friday was a bruise to my ego for some reason. I have to keep in mind what youhave said.. BP meds can effect his functioning and actually he has been honest and told me this. I can be so hard headed! I actually feel kind of bad now, because I reacted disappointed and I shouldn't have. KWIM?


At least I know in the future- not to react as if it is something about me, but rather accept it for what it is, a temporary raincheck! And you know, BE says the same thing as your bf, that he would love to please me at those times. I just have felt too guilty or selfish, but the way you have explained it makes sense..it might make he feel good that he can at least so that in those times, so I will try to keep that in mind.


I am lucky also that BE is so honest. And I also heard that some men who have a problem even temporarily will blame it on their partner. Thank God he does not do that. And I'm happy that in your case your bf seem very honest and open as well. I guess we are both very lucky in that way :o)


Thanks again for your response! Isn't is amazing what we can learn from each other here? I'm glad you "found" us here!


pacificsun2-1.jpg picture by samsigs
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-28-2008
Tue, 09-16-2008 - 11:50am

lol...well he crawled out of his "cave" later that night. We had a nice evening and he kept hinting about it..and ya, he definately made up for it ;o) that night. I just really have to learn that he is not always up for it on the sopt. Which is fine, as long as I can remember it is not me :o)


Thanks all!

pacificsun2-1.jpg picture by samsigs
pacificsun2-1.jpg picture by samsigs
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-30-2004
Tue, 09-16-2008 - 11:53am
Does he take anything that prevents him from being spontaneous?
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-28-2008
Tue, 09-16-2008 - 1:19pm

He takes blood pressure meds. And funny him....to make light of the subject he said he could stop taking them

pacificsun2-1.jpg picture by samsigs
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-30-2004
Tue, 09-16-2008 - 1:29pm
One of my friend's DH will work his med schedule around their "routine" so the max effect has worn off by the time night comes.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-28-2008
Tue, 09-16-2008 - 1:33pm
He's got an RX for that and some at home. But it is not great for spontinaity.. as it takes about 1/2 hour to take effect. But those times that he has taken it... he only takes half and I'm in trouble.. he can't stay away from me for like 12 hours lol.
pacificsun2-1.jpg picture by samsigs
pacificsun2-1.jpg picture by samsigs
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-03-2008
Tue, 09-16-2008 - 2:48pm

I'm glad I found you out here too! It has made my life a lot better. Here's the ironic twist to my BP meds tale. He's been on them and they affect his performance...I accept that and, like I said, I've learned to love how he makes up for it. I went to the doctor today because something is really wrong with me. They did a lot of tests and prescribed me one new medication.


Guess what kind? Yup, blood pressure. I had just gotten used to dealing with the effects of his meds. I am really hoping it doesn't effect me. Selfish, I know, but it is a concern!


I'm glad that I was able to help out. Trust me, it took me a long time to adjust. I won't lie, it is still hard to not take it personally from time to time. But, again, we work on it. If you ever need a sympathetic ear on this subject or need a confidence boost, you know where to find me. I've got your back! ;-)


Almalibra

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-28-2008
Tue, 09-16-2008 - 2:52pm

Thanks!!


And I hope your health tests will turn out to be something minor. BP meds for you, too huh? Well at least your bf/friend will understand and relate to the side effects. Good luck with the meds and I hope your body adjusts well. And again, I really appreciate your support and sharing your experience :o)

pacificsun2-1.jpg picture by samsigs
pacificsun2-1.jpg picture by samsigs
Avatar for mhash
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Thu, 09-18-2008 - 1:59pm

I came across this WebMD article which seems relevant to this discussion.


365 Nights of Sex: Can It Strengthen a Marriage?
When their marriages fell into the doldrums, two long-married couples decided to find out if having sex every day could boost their relationships.

By Suzanne Wright
WebMD Feature

Reviewed by Louise Chang, MD

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-15-2008
Thu, 09-18-2008 - 2:52pm

I wouldn't say I've been denied, but sometimes my plans don't pan out.