Change in BF behavior... the meaning?
Find a Conversation
| Wed, 08-08-2007 - 6:40pm |
Okay. Been dating my wonderful bf for 7 months. He's always been kind and affectionate, but not too romantic and never bought me much.
He has been separated for 2 years from someon he dated for 15 apparently happy years. They broke up because their professions made them live far from eachother. They lived a part for two years before they finally broke up.
He was away for a whole month in July over seas for work. I was a nervous wreck, I posted about ow that resolved: He bought me a bunch of gifts including a necklace and two bracelets. Totally uncharacteristic of him.
Last night I thought we should have a talk, see where things were between us. You know, we were apart for a month, both had time to do some thinking. I said any time, let me know when you are up to it. He said now is good, then starts blurting about how he realized that he really is finally OVER in his heart with his ex. He was so blissful. He said he talked to her to make an olive branch of friendship and he felt great about it. (They had not talked since he and I started dating 7 months ago, he told me that he needed the distance from her so he could fully grow apart from her, I accepted that at face value). He said now that he's really put that in the past, he's over a huge hump in our relationship. He was grinning ear to ear as he was saying this. So it was a good talk.
Yesterday I arranged a sitter so I could go bra shopping today. He asked what I was doing today so I told him matter of factly. He just about jumped out of his chair. "I'll go, too!" So noon rolls around and I head up to his place (we live within walking distance, he likes to be the driver. He drags me up to his computer room. He's so proud. He looked up sizing bras. He had on the screen all these diagrams of breasts with little totteld lines for the location of measurements (no hes NOT an engineer!). So I let him measure me. It was totally awkrard and strange, but he was so happy and all business... Then we used the java bra size calculator that he found (yes there is one for everthing)and got my correct size. I have been wearing the wrong size all these years...
Any way we head out to the shop and he kept handing me bras. It was hilarious. Try this! Try this. He's kind of a hippy-like dude, so seeing him so giddy over all this satin and lace was a riot. I tried on about 20 bras and picked 6 (I needed them badly). He wanted to pay for them all!! I wouldn't let him, but he bought me a shirt and paid for his three favorites.
SO what the heck? I mean it's fun and all. but why the change? Is it the ex girlfriend thing? He kept using

It was the time apart I am sure. I have seen this happen many times. Men realize what they have when they don't have it. And absence makes the heart grow fonder.
ENJOY!
OMG= ok, I don't have an answer for you, but MAN- that was a HILARIOUS story :)
I can just picture the whole thing: men are just so "on a mission" aren't they???
I'm sorry darlin, but I almost burst my stitches this morning reading and imagining him with the whole bra measurement scenario. HILARIOUS!
It is SO true with what Alison says about men and the MISSION!
I really think that he realized how much he cared about you etc. when he left for that month. It seems that ever since that things have changed quite a bit.
He seems like a real sweetie and a cutie! You have been so patient and so great about it all! You deserve this treatment!
Big hugs and congrat's
- cat.
hehehe, I love it! It was so cute that he was so over-the-top about the whole thing. ;-)
I would have to agree, absence does make the heart grow fonder. Enjoy it, lady! You deserve it!
~Nicole
Thanks all!
I have been enjoying it. I think a couple things happened. He was away, and he found it surprisingly good to get back to me. (He said this) And also, in the month away, I planned ahead to have all kinds of me-projects, with remodeling my house, doing some art, initiating some interesting projects at work. I did this to help keep my mind off him while he was away (although it still drove me nuts).
So he came back and I'm all busy with cool projects feeling invigorated about life and confident in myself instead of clingy and all, " oh honey, I missed you so much and I was miserable without you... etc."
It is fun to be pampered so much. Tonight he cooked my son and me dinner and he's coming 'round later for some extracurriculars.