Could i JUST have a normal date???

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2004
Could i JUST have a normal date???
37
Thu, 06-26-2008 - 2:53pm

Ok - So ... lunch date w/ that EH

Photobucket

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2004
Thu, 06-26-2008 - 10:56pm

Photobucket

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2004
Thu, 06-26-2008 - 10:57pm
BAHAHAHA! About having my number! Its true .......... BUT, maybe you need my address, so you can come & DO MY LAWN.

Photobucket

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-25-2007
Thu, 06-26-2008 - 11:02pm
OMG WHAT A PIECE OF WORK - you are a saint for putting up with

mom_uk2socal - Mom to DS22, DS19, DD16

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-06-1998
Fri, 06-27-2008 - 8:21am
Oh gee Rebecca your "friend" sounds insane! I'm another one who would never have the patience to put up with her crap! She needs help.
I must admit your date sounded much nicer in that last bit you posted. I hope you have a nice time ....... or you have a horrid one & your "friend" has an even worse time! ;o) LOL

 



Tracy

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-22-2006
Fri, 06-27-2008 - 8:44am
Wow have we all had one of these crazy entitled needy controlling gfs in our live we have had to shed? I had one that I had to call it quits with a few months ago.A part of me was sad but most of me was relieved. She was not willing to look at her issues and has been pushing people away with her behavior for years. It definitely seems like your gf made a play for this guy after the fact just to see how the two of you would compare. That is um.....JUNIOR high school I believe. YIKES. And I would not be surprised if she tries to call during your date or like you said peeks around the corner.
There seems to be a common thing with these women which is a humungous lack of boundaries or ability to see them. I had this problem with my gf. She was constantly stepping over the line and pressing buttons over and over again with people I loved. I would try to include her in my life but she never felt like she had enough access. It was exhausting and she didnt understand my frustrations - always had a reason, or a justification or just shook the whole thing off. Over Christmas I had seen her for a Christmas party at her house with DS and then for a few weeks SYB was in a really sad state with both of his parents death anniversaries falling during that time and this was his first Christmas sans Mom. It was horrible for him and he was so low. I told everyone including her who called that I needed some down tie with him and wasnt going out much or making time for get togethers because he needed some support and I was keeping busy at home making sure he was ok. EVERYONE was ok but her. She wanted to be involved somehow. Called after I asked her to let me call her when I had a free moment. Was clearly annoyed on a voicemail that she hadnt had time to give us her Christmas gifts and now she didnt know what to do with them. I was so angry I told her she was out of line and needed to back completely off. I didnt need someone clawing for attention a that time. Since then we have gotten through the holiday down season of course and I am so glad I saw him through that. I remember my first holiday season without my Mom and it was like an excruciating haze. SYB is such a bright light usually and he needed me so I am happy I could be there for him.
So get this - I go to my therapy session as I usually do a month or so ago and my therapist says "um I have something I need to talk to you about" and she proceeds to tell me that this ex friend of mine sent her a package ( no idea how she got her address, she must have gotten her name out of me in conversation and she herself refuses therapy) of all of the gifts from christmas, a very long nasty note about me and what she thinks my problem is, and a piece of jewelry that was my moms that I had given her once long ago. Can we say boundary issues????
Believe me with some of these women it gets worse before it gets better!!!
Lilypie - Personal picture
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-11-2007
Fri, 06-27-2008 - 10:00am

She sent it to your therapist?

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-22-2006
Fri, 06-27-2008 - 10:14am
I really shouldnt have been surprised but I was. I mean considering all of our issues in our friendship were about her wanting more than I could give in terms of time and energy ( much like rlch and her person it seems) and then her not seeing boundaries AT ALL you would think that sending a package to my therapist would be a big no no but for me it just sealed the fact that I have no room in my life for her. Funny enough my therapist encouraged and validated my need to remove her from my life. I never read the letter she wrote but when I asked the therapist for the gyst she said that basically the letter was long and wanted to be about me but in fact was more about her. That was ll I needed to hear. I mean what was she doing? - telling the therapist she hoped she was up on all of my "issues"? And believe me, my therapist is well aware of my issues, lol - she's no dummie! keep in mind my "friend" refuses to go to therapy. She does deep massage instead. Uhhuh. That kind of drama can stay as far away from me as possible.
She also used to just claim she had trouble seeing boundaries because of her childhood and alternative culture lifestyle ( see: hippy) and I just kept thinking excuses excuses excuses. I mean at a certain point you just have to think "wow, keep your life as open as you want but you either see my boundaries and respect them or get lost." You can be a hippy and still respect someone else's space!
Lilypie - Personal picture
Avatar for mhash
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Fri, 06-27-2008 - 10:30am
Sure I'll do your lawn Rebecca but I only do bushes ...
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-11-2007
Fri, 06-27-2008 - 10:30am

She also used to just claim she had trouble seeing boundaries because of her childhood


SEV and I just had this discussion last night.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2002
Fri, 06-27-2008 - 10:40am

so you can come & DO MY LAWN.


ROTFL..... it must be too long since someone has mowed my lawn..... that comment is cracking me up!