Court in the AM & everyone was right ...

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2004
Court in the AM & everyone was right ...
14
Wed, 01-31-2007 - 9:11am

X never did go see the Pysc (as far as I know, b/c the guy said he would notify me IF X called him .... AND,

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-25-2007
Wed, 01-31-2007 - 10:32am
Nice don't ya love it when the court can't evenhelp you out. I don't know the full story here, but I have similar problems. My ex husband hasnt paid a dime in CS for a year now. Support Enforcement is on it, but he is selfemployed, so they can't attach his wages,and his vehicle is in his girlfriends name,and they don't own anything.We went through audits when we were married,and he hasn't paid anything on that bill. I am trying to be relieved of the debt by doing the innocent spouce thing,and should find out the ruling on that in a few months.My ex is pissed that I'm going that way,but hey,I have assets in my name and don't want to loose them..I feel for you completely and wish you good luck with it all..
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-25-2007
Wed, 01-31-2007 - 10:36am
P.S, aboutthe name calling, isn't there anyway you could record him calling you 2 names?? Something like that to me would warrent supervised visits??? Like I said I don'y know your whole story,but that is awful!!
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-08-2006
Wed, 01-31-2007 - 1:22pm

Rebecca, HUGS to you! I hope everything goes well, keep us updated!

I am in disbelief at what a jerk he is to and around Averey. Not getting along with your ex is one thing, but the way he behaves around her makes me SO mad!

I really wish the best for you, and especially for that sweet little girl! No wonder she doesn't want you to date if she thinks all men behave like HIM!

Moody, fired up


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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-30-2003
Wed, 01-31-2007 - 3:50pm

Wow, what a jerk!!!

I will tell you something a bailiff said to me after one of my custody hearing dates. The ex was a jerk and got angry in the courtroom. The bailiff stopped me as I was leaving (after I won) and said to me in private, "Don't worry. He will act like in front of any judge he meets. You keep your cool and you will win every time." He was right. Your ex won't ever change. These judges have seen it 100's of times. You will have to jump through the hoops and spend a crazy amount of money, but it will all work out in your favor eventually.

I am starting to think he does need supervised visits if his comments are so nasty. My ex will never win any parenting prizes, but he would not be hostile if DS whispered anything to me. Not blatantly hostile. He does his emotional damage quietly.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2005
Wed, 01-31-2007 - 5:11pm

OMGoodness R!!! Your exh gets the Jerk of the Year award. He is so emotionally immature and a bully to boot.

I agree with fivesense and with what you were saying about getting there 15 min early - all I can say is that I wish you luck!! It doesn't sound like you will solve this in one go.

But I do see that you have to stand up to him and put him in his place. Best to stand your ground now and keep him from learning that this is okay. I wish you strength, wisdom and perseverance. And I do know that you will have those.

It could very well be that this anger will never leave him. Have you thought of counseling? The only reason I say this is because maybe you can get some good ideas of how to handle him and his actions - and that would make you look better. I do know that time and money are an issue.

I also worry he might try to cause you some kind of physical harm. Do be careful, okay?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2004
Wed, 01-31-2007 - 6:32pm

Thast EXACTLY what he is ... a bully.


I have tried everythign - & i DO mean everything, from standing up to him, to not answering his calls when i know he is crazy & he wants to see dd, to having a Gaurdian ad Litum appointed, to seeing my own therapist, to seeing if we could do co-parenting counseling together, to asking the court to appt him to HAVE to see a co-parenting counselor (this is the current order he is refusing to follow), to asking the courts if they can mandate him to be in therapy, to be on meds (he has major depression & I am POSITIVE he is BiPolar), to having dd in counseling ... I could go on & on. Even being NICE to him - & I mean I am that more than anything, for dd's sake. eg: he threw his back out last week, *I* went to pick up his scripts & he gave me his cc to get him a heating pad. I got him & Ave dinner one nite she was there.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2004
Wed, 01-31-2007 - 6:38pm
Ugh- how crappy do *I* feel right now???

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2004
Wed, 01-31-2007 - 6:39pm
Thank you, Im sorry youre going thru that as well.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2004
Wed, 01-31-2007 - 6:44pm

I have asked for supervised visits more than once. I did get them at the beginning ... ONE visit, which was the 1st after a 5 wk RO & he hadnt seen dd (this was May 2005) & that visit ended in the police being called b/c he was out of his mind & woudlnt give dd back after she SNUCK to a phone in his friends house (the "supervisor" was his friend who i THOUGHT i trusted) & begged me to come get her b/c he was scaring by saying mean things about me ... it was a nitemare. Thats when the GAL was involved & she ended up saying "No more supervised visits b/c" ... get this ... "It sets him off too much". SURE ... throw MY kid to the wolves b/c YOU dont want to deal with all this.


& honestly, I dont think anyone DOESNT believe he acts this way. I just havent been able to get anyone to BELEIVE me. I have him on tape threatening to "burn the house down with me in it" & admitting to threats to kill me in the past. THAT did nothing in the old family court judges eyes as to settlement.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2004
Wed, 01-31-2007 - 6:45pm
I know Moody - it sickens me. & the worst is he is SO inconsistent.

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