Dating Question for Single Moms
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Dating Question for Single Moms
| Tue, 04-29-2008 - 6:43am |
Hello All:
I need a little female pespective on something......
I have had an "on again, off again" relationship with a women that I dearly love for nearly three years.

Has she ever said that she loved you? Has she ever intimated that she wants anything other than a FWB situation? Have the two of you ever sat down and had "the talk" about whether either of you want to be exclusive now or in the future and what your goals are in this relationhip?
I tend to think that if you havent had those very blunt conversations and she hasnt let you know that she loves you in those words - you may have defaulted into a FWB thing by virtue of how much time has passed. Three years is a long time and you would think that she would transition you guys into something more stable if that is truly what she wanted. It also seems like you have been giving her tons of space and freedom and tip toeing around and in my opinion that has only perpetuated your status. Sure, she is a single mom but single moms are totally capable of correctly defining a relationship within three years so that everyone is comfortable. We certainly appreciate when our lack of free time is taken into consideration and all of the things you have said you have done sound wonderful but it also seems overboard to me now and like maybe you have become a bit of a doormat in this situation.
I think also that if she is still dating other people after three years you really need to rethink this for yourself. Whatever feelings you have for her it doesnt seem as if she can reciprocate them. Even when people have been hurt before, have trouble trusting, need time to acclimate to the pressures of a relationship again, have to prioritize their kids before you - they can still get around to addressing their own fears and dealing with things and make their way around to taking the leap with you if the emotions are there.
Are you happy in a situation where you are being taken for granted? Is it possible for you to not feel that way at this point?
I'm sorry, MoreX, but I simply don't think she is capable of the kind of relationship you would like to have with her.
For the record - I love this quote!! It's soo soo true.
I agree that she may not be capable of giving what he wants. Maybe she figures if it aint broke done fix it and it is working just fine for her. It seems it must be if she is letting it go on like this for three years....
It doesn't sound like this one has potential. Especially given the amount of time this has dragged on. I would think that if she really loved you she would make time for you instead of filling up every waking minute with stuff that is more busy work. But that is just me because I can always make an SO a priority and come up with enough time for a relationship if I really like him.
I wonder, is she bolting because she doesn't love you romantically the way you love her and she feels smothered? Or is she bolting because she has deep emotional damage from a childhood or bad marriage?
Welcome..ITA with everyone else.You just may need to back off and see...
((HUGS))
~~Tiny
I want
~Karen˙·٠•●♥Ƹ̵̡Ӝ
Thank you very much for your answers.
Thanks for your comments.
Hi Matt,
Welcome to the board.
I'm sorry that things aren't what you hope for.