Divorcing

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-21-2003
Divorcing
11
Thu, 06-07-2007 - 11:36pm

We made the decision last night. I can't talk about it right now, but I will after my trip. I leave tomorrow night for the weekend. I will be back and will tell you the details. Thanks for being there.

~Mel~

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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-23-2006
In reply to: lissa91
Fri, 06-08-2007 - 7:53am
Huge hugs to you and lots of prayers.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-07-2005
In reply to: lissa91
Fri, 06-08-2007 - 10:00am

Mel,


I'm glad that you two made the decision.


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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2003
In reply to: lissa91
Fri, 06-08-2007 - 11:01am
I know your in a lot of hurt, but I too feel that you have made the right decision. You need someone that fits too you and I have always said, even if I had two dozen children, I rather be alone, then be with the wrong person for the rest of my life. I don't know if M is the right person. I always thought that the RIGHT person was at my door step and I have been bitterly disapointed, but I have NEVER, with all the hundreds of men I have dated, given up the idea that the right one IS out their for me. Either in the form of M or in the form of someone else. I know, in my heart, I will eventually find him, as will everyone on this board. Some of us have luck and find someone right away, while others spend many years alone until the right one comes along. It's all ok. It will happen. Just keep the faith.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-03-2003
In reply to: lissa91
Sat, 06-09-2007 - 3:59am

Deciding to divorce can never be easy.


While you're feeling strong, I hope you will write down everything that contributed to this decision, and keep it someplace safe.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-04-2004
In reply to: lissa91
Sat, 06-09-2007 - 10:44am

Hugs about this, Mel. I know this is simply not what you wanted or hoped for. But I do hope things will be better for you now that you won't be living on the separation roller-coaster of being in limbo. Now you won't be second-guessing everything and not knowing which way to turn. At least now you KNOW. But I know that doesn't help ease the pain. So (((((((hugs)))))))) to you.

~shrimpy

~shrimpy

"A man who wants something will find a way; a man who doesn't will find an excuse." ~Stephen Dolley Jr.

~<

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2005
In reply to: lissa91
Sat, 06-09-2007 - 8:25pm
Oh dear - I know that is not what you wanted. But now you know what is the outcome now and can get started with all the work to heal and move on. And of course we are always here to listen. I think it is a good idea by Soonee to write down your story. I did that and found it to be therapeutic.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
In reply to: lissa91
Sun, 06-10-2007 - 9:06am
I haven't been on here long, and don't know your whole story, but I'm sorry, nonetheless. I'm sure this will be difficult, but you will come out so much better for it, having learned some hard lessons, and being the person you want to be. And somewhere out there is the one that can be what you need him to be.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-21-2003
In reply to: lissa91
Mon, 06-11-2007 - 8:06pm

My trip was fabulous. I had the best time. My cousins were so therapeutic for me and we just relaxed and had a great time. I shopped and ate and drank and sat in the hot tub and soaked life in. It was so hard to come back yesterday and he started getting nasty with me immediately. Made me want to run and hide forever.

My cousins want to do sexy calendars next month and have us take on different personalities. They are all married and can give their's to their men, but I have no one. K says that I need to do it anyway FOR ME. She said she is not doing it for him. It is for her and her own self esteem. I think that is a good idea. I guess I'll be going back next month to do my photos.

I'm really tired. Stressed out about all of this since I returned. I am struggling even to sleep even though we've made the decision. I gave him an ultimatum and that forced it. I said that he needed to either agree to counseling or just let me go. He chose to let me go. So that is that. But he said he refuses to close the door on the hope that maybe one day we will get our crap straight and find one another again. Not sure about that. I adore him but I know he's not healthy for me. No one is right now.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-03-2003
In reply to: lissa91
Tue, 06-12-2007 - 12:18am

I'm confused... why would you want other women's husbands

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2003
In reply to: lissa91
Tue, 06-12-2007 - 5:00pm
I agree. I don't think it would be a wise decision to make any sort of photos like that. Especially going into a divorce. You shouldn't want to have photos like that end up in the wrong hands and you should have any self esteem issues. You are a beautiful wonderful woman who will find the right man.

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