Do I call...and what do I say?
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| Sat, 05-12-2007 - 6:11pm |
This if my first post to this forum, but I've been lurking for the last few months as I've been trying to get up the nerve to get back into the dating game. I've been separated/divorced for two years and have a daughter who's five.
My three sisters and I went out last night (my first real night out since the separation) and at the end of the night I met a guy who I briefly talked to (maybe 15-20 minutes) was attractive and seemed nice. After chatting for a few minutes he gave me his business card and asked me to give him a call sometime. It was late and I didn't have my purse so I couldn't write my number down for him. He gave me a few compliments (pretty eyes, etc.) - which was exactly what I'd hoped to get out of the night; someone to make me feel like a woman. Again, before I left, he said, "really, I'd like it if you'd give me call sometime."
But...my question is, should I call this guy? AND more importantly, if I did call him, what on earth do I say? I'm sure I'd feel like such a DORK! lol
I haven't really ever even dated...I met my Ex when I was 18, that was almost 20 years ago. I SO want to start dating but it's all a little nerve wracking.
Tracy

Welcome, Tracy, to our humble board. And to our club, which we call OTA- for Over Thinkers Anonymous!
Absolutely, I vote for giving him a call! And kudos to you for getting out there again.
I say if you have his business number, call it during a time that isn't business hours- like 7 pm or something, and leave a voicemail. This way, he'll get it the next morning when he comes in, and the ball will firmly be back in his court, AND you won't have to initiate the awkward first call.
Leave a short, sweet message reminding him your name and where you saw each other. I might say something like, "Hi, it's Tracy, we met at XXXXX on Friday night. I had a great time, you can reach me at (123)456-7890. Have a great day!" And that would be that.
THEN, I would get busy getting busy so I wasn't waiting for the phone to ring. When it does, you'll be pleasantly surprised. If it doesn't, you'll be too busy to notice.
Hope this helps, and I'm sure everyone will chime in, too!
Moody, who would take the easy way out
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Welcome! I am new also, been posting for just a few weeks after lurking for a few months myself. I definately vote for giving him a call. He would not have given you his card if he did not hope to hear from you. I think the suggestion for calling after work hours is great. Keep the message short and sweet. The most important thing is to just leave him with your number and then see what he does.
It took me just about 2 years to get back into dating also. I also got married at 20, so never really dated much before. I have been dating for a little over a year, one guy seriously for about 5 months, then a few casual dates. I have been seeing someone I met online (new to OLD, been doing it about a month now)I met 3 different men, all very nice. Tomorrow will be my fourth date with this guy and so far he seems to have lots of potential! Either way it is fun to get out and meet new people, and after 2 years it is time for some adult time! Good luck, and let us know how it goes.
Laurie
Welcome. I think Moody has a good solution to avoid the feeling like a dork part. Hopefully, he doesn't work late!
Don't worry too much about starting over later in life. Since you've been lurking for a bit you may already know this- I met my X at 14, never dated anyone else, actually never dated- we were a couple from the start. There I was 45, with 2 teens, a toddler and still not sure I was beyond the psycho X. I just kept putting myself out there, while working on making my life full on my own, on being totally OK with being single forever. I had a blast with the dating thing, met a lot of nice guys through OLD and friends setting us up. Each date that didn't go anywhere I chalked up to practice and an opportunity to figure out what I was looking for now. Eventually, I met M through our kids mutual activities. We've been together for nearly a year now.
So try to not be a card carrying member of the Over Thinking club, at least don't join the board of directors! LOL Have fun, there's ALWAYS another guy out there to date.
Hi Tracy - welcome to the board and officially out of lurkdom!
My vote is - YES CALL HIM! What do you have to lose? I too like the suggestion of calling him a little after hours. Then it will be up to him to follow up.
I am more or less the same age as you - I have two daughters 5 & 3 yrs old. I have found that there seem to be quite a few opportunities for women of our age and circumstance. Go have some adult fun time, you just never know where it might lead...
Rose - who is just starting to get out there and having an absolute blast! :)
Yeah, what Moody said.
I second this - everything Moody said! She put all that into words just great!
Welcome!
Yes, I would also agree - great idea to call out of business hours - very clever, Moody.
:o)
Clem xx
Moody, thanks so much for the great idea. I'm definitely going to try the calling after hours...brilliant!
Tracy