Eeeeeks. TG called
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Eeeeeks. TG called
| Mon, 05-12-2008 - 7:29am |
He called last night at around 11 pm.. i didn't answer the phone because i was afraid of what he would say... i thought it would hurt my feelings again to hear him talk mean.... i was

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No, i'm pretty sure he was refering to someone mistaking me for someone else... but i plan to be honest about Sean.. in as much as Sean will most definately call or text me again in the future.. and when Sean starts calling .. he'll call all night... and also send dirty text messages... So if TG is too jealous to believe me if i said "i won't see him if i'm your girlfriend".... "i'll just ignore him and maybe he'll eventually stop.".... If the tables were turned... that would be a hard one for me to swallow.... i'd be jealous if an old FWB kept calling him..... but no excuses... TG either trusts me at some point or we call the whole thing off...
And i know the same thing goes for me.. at some point i trust that TG isn't using drugs or lying to me... but trust takes time to build... and i'll state that to him.. and see his theory on trust too...
I appreciate your theory... my abusive ex was arrested on mother's day.. because for him that day did trigger him.. the ex had MAJOR issues with is mother.
BUT TG has said only very respectful and greats things about his mother... that was the first positive sign i noticed about TG right from the start. He's talked about how well she took care of him and his siblings...how well his dad treated his mother... etc... how much he loves his family...
Loony,
While i appreciate your point.. i'm not going to jump to conclusions before talking to him... pretty much following Alison's post to a tee...
If you missed some of the beginning post.. i was very cautious to look for signs of abusive personality.. But i also saw many traits in him that were NOT abusive too...
looking for signs has been at the forefront but i can't discount every guy at the first sign.. as if i'm paranoid.. My boyfriend from Florida came on strong in the beginning too... and today i was thinking... even he went into a "pull back" phase... We dated for 3 months before he moved back to Florida.. we were in love (and despite the short period it was REAL)... but long distance is hard... and i was young and insecure .. we'd write each other daily .. then all of a sudden i stopped hearing from him.. hmm.. my first thought was he found a new girlfriend in florida and he was blowing me off...
So for the next 3 weeks, i assumed we were broken up and i started dating someone new... just when the new guy and I were becoming girlfriend-boyfriend... Florida called... he wasn't breaking up with me.. he was just taking some time to figured out what he was doing with his life.. took for granted that i would always be there.....and i was like ... too late you jerk, i have a new boyfriend... He called the airlines on three way calling and said "i'll buy your ticket right now.. move to Florida with me. Marry me.".. well being young and scared i said, i just can't do it... THAT was one of the biggest mistake and biggest regrets of my life... about 6 months later i called him saying i just can't forget him.. but in that time, he got a girl pregnant and they were planning to marry..... he said to me, i love you more, but i have to do what's right.. and so Florida and i never got together... 10 years later... after my divorce and Florida's divorce and the internet.. we started a long distance relationship again.. and i visited him 3 times... they were some of my best memories... But alas we couldn't be together because he had kids and i had kids and we still lived miles apart... So i finally came to a peaceful place that he will be an important person in my life but not my lover or husband... and i still talk to him today... so if ya wanna get technical... when TG asked how many guys i'm talking to... Florida is another... but he's only a friend.... Come to think of it, Florida always said he thought i was too good for him or that he was nothing and i deserved better.... maybe that's a young guy kind of thinking...
My point about that whole story was... i guess it is possible that guys can have a "pull back" phase... get scared when there emotions get strong.... we'll see.... but it looks like i tend to go freakazoid when men pull back... so hmmmm maybe i'm learning something from all of this.. no matter what the outcome tonight..
I'm still moving forward.
Loonybunny
"How many guys are you talking to?"
I know that you're blaming yourself for the reaction to the "pull back", buuut I really think that he went to an extreme.
Hey I LOOOVE this quote. Love it.
"In the first 6 months put the weight of your decisions on the bad. If the positive behaviour is STILL there after a year THEN and ONLY THEN start believing in the good behaviour, and giving them weight".
i'm not saying i figured him out.. by any means.. i'm just saying a lot will depend on our conversation tonight... some part of me still thinks it's going to be the break up talk...
If it's the breakup talk then i'll leave with no regrets..... no hard feelings...
If it's not the break up talk... if it's the how can we work this out talk... well, i have my list of relationship requirements.. my boundaries... things i'll need to go forward... i know what i have to say.. and if he's not receptive... i still won't blame myself and i'll walk away with a clear conscience... and get my camera this time..lol...
Either way, i learned that i'm a new loony... i'm in a win-win situation.. the best kind to be in...
i still plan on winning my emmy.. i still plan on entering karaoke contests... still plan on joining savannah for girls night out... still plan on making new friends in my new city... i still plan on building a new church home... i'm still moving forward ... one day at a time...
The hardest thing i did was walk away from my abusive ex... and i was with him for 3 years... and i didn't know what my life would be like after i left him... now i know.. it
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