End of CK

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-06-2008
End of CK
48
Thu, 07-31-2008 - 8:20pm

Driving for 8 hours really allows for a lot of thinking.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-01-2007
In reply to: sweetkymom
Fri, 08-01-2008 - 10:11am
LOL - meant to reply to this one too startover - my ex had NO emotions either.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-30-2004
In reply to: sweetkymom
Fri, 08-01-2008 - 10:12am
I think my issue has been that I want to bolt as soon as I know something is up.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2008
In reply to: sweetkymom
Fri, 08-01-2008 - 10:12am

Youre right. You deserve the best. Set your standards high and stick with it. I

anonymous
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-06-2008
In reply to: sweetkymom
Fri, 08-01-2008 - 11:51am
With the way my ex was behaving at the end, I wouldn't doubt we were married to the same guy! LOL!!!
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-06-2008
In reply to: sweetkymom
Fri, 08-01-2008 - 11:58am

"I think my issue has been that I want to bolt as soon as I know something is up. I don't want to waste time trying to prove to some guy why he should pick me or want to be with me. So in my case I want to beat them to the punch and get out before they can hurt me. That's been kind of an issue with me in regards to my relationship."

I find myself doing this, too. I have been seeing this guy for over a month now, and HE KEEPS COMING BACK. So when I am with him, I look for something to go "wrong" so I can get out before I get hurt. But it doesn't happen. For instance, last night, he kept yawning so I quipped "I must be pretty boring" and he kept apologizing, then asked me what I was doing on Saturday. In my head, I was half hoping he WAS bored. The more interested I get, the more worried I get. It shouldn't be this way, I know.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-30-2004
In reply to: sweetkymom
Fri, 08-01-2008 - 12:07pm

I'm the same way.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2005
In reply to: sweetkymom
Fri, 08-01-2008 - 6:12pm

"Bottom line - I won't EVER be treated badly again."

BRAVO - that is a good mantra!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2002
In reply to: sweetkymom
Fri, 08-01-2008 - 6:34pm

I think my issue has been that I want to bolt as soon as I know something is up.


Hey, i can relate to that as well... I'd rather bolt first. I feel the same way, i'm not going to prove myself... either he gets me for who i am or he doesn't... i played that hamster wheel game with my ex (trying everything to please them, keep them, make them proud, etc.). Not gonna do it this time. I'm going to be me, whatever that may be, and make decisions for me. All while keeping my eyes \ ears open.


and yet occasionally, it's okay to be a fool too... i believe there is no solid right or wrong answer as long as i dont' do anything against my will... ya know.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-04-2004
In reply to: sweetkymom
Fri, 08-01-2008 - 7:08pm

I'm finding it interesting that so many here have that urge to bolt when something starts to look BIG or serious. Like when there is a chance you might get hurt or find yourself in deeper than you want.


I know I've been there... many times. And I never could figure out just WHY I would feel that way. Why the fear? I remember asking myself that one many times, and for years.


I'm not sure why it's different now, but for some reason it is. I'm not saying I didn't have some times of doubt when things started building with Hiker- but for some reason, this time it didn't seem as scary. And I didn't do anything (intentionally or unintentionally) to sabotage the building relationship out of fear of hurt. I wish I could figure out how I got through it so I could share some wisdom or whatever here- but I'm really not sure what it is.


There are times when I get a bit of stress knowing that if things ended with Hiker

~shrimpy

"A man who wants something will find a way; a man who doesn't will find an excuse." ~Stephen Dolley Jr.

~<

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2008
In reply to: sweetkymom
Sat, 08-02-2008 - 8:28am

In a way thats a good thing. I am on the opposite end of the spectrum. I hang in there knowing full well its not going to work out. I want to learn to bolt too.

Laurie

anonymous