Everytime Our Eyes Meet....
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| Mon, 04-03-2006 - 4:36pm |
This Feeling inside me is almost more than I can bear....
All right, so I met P on Saturday night at a local bar. I chose it because I knew it was close (in case I needed to get home), it would be quiet (it's very small), and my friends knew where it was and how to get there (just in case-one of them knew I was there). We talked. And talked. And talked. They kicked us out after about 4 hours.
I had nothing to be worried about as far as the "face to face" connection. The chemistry might not be as spontaneously combustible as it is with R, but it isn't non-existent, and we've only met once, and I was pretty nervous to begin with. The conversation, the fact that he makes me laugh, and the fact that he's "that into me" makes up for it.
So, he said he'd like to see me again at the end of the night, I said I would too, he said he'd call me, and we parted ways (there was a very nice hug). Sunday afternoon when I logged into my messenger he had left me a very sweet IM the night before, right after getting home from our date.
We im'ed Sunday afternoon, and talked for a long time last night. We're going to dinner Friday. Then he's going to come and see the band play if dinner goes well. My friends are totally stoked, he seems excited, and I'm nervous-excited.
I'm still kind of worried, since he seems to be everything I want- I'm supposed to be dating lots of different guys before I figure out which one to be with, not find the right one the first time! Right?! So, I'm not overthinking this (or, trying not to), and just enjoying it. Him meeting my friends is sort of big for me, but even though it's only our second actual date, we have been talking for a while.
SO, there's the update. The great conversations have continued, and neither one of us has been scared off by meeting in person, if anything, we're probably both trying really, really hard not to rush headlong into this. I wish another date would come along, simply so I'd have something else to obsess over for a while. And because I feel like I'm supposed to be dating more than one guy.
By the way- I met him through Yahoo- but I'm also signed up for Match and SingleParentMeet.com. Yahoo has the most people signed up near me (I'm in the world's smallest town, and not near ANY big cities) but are they the best matches? That remains to be seen. Before him, I hadn't ever had any luck with yahoo, but I also have only been actively signed up for about a month or so.

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As always, you're completely dead-on! I KNOW it isn't about me, and whether he is not into me or whatever. I know he's got issues. I know he's not the one for me. I know all of these things. This morning, it stung (for all the wrong reasons), but I'm over it.
My reply email was basically saying, sure, we can be friends, see you around. Which is all we've ever been anyhow (except for the random kissing, which was only making me second guess myself, anyways), so it's all for the best.
The fact that I'm not emotionally (unless you count rejection as an emotion-that's what I was feeling) torn by this makes me KNOW it wasn't meant to be. I'm actually looking forward to this friendship, since now that the air's been cleared and we both have said, let's just be friends, the whole group can just be friends without any drama or craziness.
I don't really care if someone told him I was dating other people, I never told him I wasn't (and I wasn't technically dating him), and since P is coming with me on Friday, he would have figured it out, but I doubt that's the case. I just don't care anymore. I obviously didn't care enough to begin with.
He was a fun crush, and I've moved on. He'll still be a friend, but basically only because we have things and friends in common. We'll always see each other around, but he's not the kind of friend I'd call if I were in trouble or needed to vent, the way the rest of the guys in the band are. So, live and learn.
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Something tells me R is going to have a greater rejection reaction than you just did when he sees you with P. But as you so eloquently spell the arrangement here you will not care and it will all be water under the bridge.
It sounds to me like R is like so many adults, and especially older adult men, that get "stuck" and cannot move on or be available because of their past. Further, it is my observation that many (not all) men don't "need" or want relationships the way we women do. So you made a wise decision and even better still you ended up with someone better.
R will have to sing a song about his comfort zone.
"Further, it is my observation that many (not all) men don't "need" or want relationships the way we women do. "
I agree!
Stephanie
I'm so happy for you! You deserve this!
I was so busy this week and part of last, that I didn't have a chance to wish you good luck or otherwise. I think its so awesome that things are working out so well with P. AND tomorrow is already FRIDAY. YAY!
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