Oh Rose, sweetie, I know this is such a hard time of year for so many people and especially single moms. It seems that the whole perfect holiday is one where everyone is able, well, happy, rich and in one big family and I know that is not the case for so many. It does suck to be literally torn in half as a family and watch the kids have a Xmas that is not traditional or the way they knew it.
I think that to us as adults, holidays and Xmas are about family but to kids they are about presents and positive times and what is in it for them.
I think that as long as you can be positive and make the day easy for them, they will be okay. You have to focus on new traditions and the positive parts of this arrangement. "We get to spend Xmas eve together and open presents then you get to see your cousins and dad and open more presents." As long as you appear happy and positive they will be too. Perhaps you can get them more ready for their transition - "Let's put the gifts away or out of the way so they stay safe and make you look pretty for your next party." Doing that in advance does make it more smooth.
HUGS. It sounds to me like you have everything mapped out well with regards to what you will do. You do have a lot of positives - I hope all of our stories here have made you realize that because there are many who have things that are not that way and you can be happy with what you do have and start anew.
Feeling a bit blue, too.... My daughters played with and than hid/lost my purse somewhere in the house... along with two gift cards. They are 4 and 3 so, either they don't remember where they hid it or don't want to tell me. Everyone (me, my mom, my brother, my sil) have searched the house top to bottom twice... we can't find it.
Here are some of the explanations they've given... "a monster took it", they flushed it down the toilet, they threw it out the window, over the fence, in the trash bin.... Inside my purse was my digital camera, my keys, my driver's license, social security cards (for everyone), my bank cards, credit card.... I had no access to money all weekend... my mom loaned me money so I could finish xmas shopping. Then when my phone was almost out of charge I remembered the charger was in my purse too. *big frown*....
I know the children will enjoy christmas... and I will too when it gets here... Right now, though, stress!!
Sorry I couldn't be more cheerful, but i hope it helps to know you are not alone. Emmanuel.
Oh my goodness - that is totally crazy - I would go bananas without my purse never mind if it had all those things. I hope you find it. Keep us posted!!
This sounds a little crazy - but do you think it could be behind the bed? For some reason when we can't find something, we always look there and many times what DS was playing with falls behind his bed.
It is probably some place really obvious and stupid and you will find it!!
It HAS driven me bananas... so much so that i'm beginning to believe them that a monster took it... LOL. Everyone saw it on the kitchen counter at night and it was gone in the morning... so some time in them middle of the night is when it happen. ARGH.
I've been singing "I wanna know/where my purse is...." to the tune of "Whats On Your Mind" by Information Society....
I am laughing so hard about the monster. Did you look in the kitchen trash? OMG. What a huge pain and inconvenience.
"I've been singing "I wanna know/where my purse is...." to the tune of "Whats On Your Mind" by Information Society...."
You know what, Loony? You missed your calling to be a wonderful musician/singer of some sort. That is definitely a great way to deal with it all and very cute, too. You are always singing!
same here - for the first year I invited ex-h with kids to have xmas here, (after he kindly invited me for tgiving as I have no family here), x-h forgot and they were invited to one of his family, and as thats what the kids wanted to do - they will come back to me early evening.
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Oh Rose, sweetie, I know this is such a hard time of year for so many people and especially single moms. It seems that the whole perfect holiday is one where everyone is able, well, happy, rich and in one big family and I know that is not the case for so many. It does suck to be literally torn in half as a family and watch the kids have a Xmas that is not traditional or the way they knew it.
I think that to us as adults, holidays and Xmas are about family but to kids they are about presents and positive times and what is in it for them.
I think that as long as you can be positive and make the day easy for them, they will be okay. You have to focus on new traditions and the positive parts of this arrangement. "We get to spend Xmas eve together and open presents then you get to see your cousins and dad and open more presents." As long as you appear happy and positive they will be too. Perhaps you can get them more ready for their transition - "Let's put the gifts away or out of the way so they stay safe and make you look pretty for your next party." Doing that in advance does make it more smooth.
HUGS. It sounds to me like you have everything mapped out well with regards to what you will do. You do have a lot of positives - I hope all of our stories here have made you realize that because there are many who have things that are not that way and you can be happy with what you do have and start anew.
I hope this helps - keep us posted, okay?
Feeling a bit blue, too.... My daughters played with and than hid/lost my purse somewhere in the house... along with two gift cards. They are 4 and 3 so, either they don't remember where they hid it or don't want to tell me. Everyone (me, my mom, my brother, my sil) have searched the house top to bottom twice... we can't find it.
Here are some of the explanations they've given... "a monster took it", they flushed it down the toilet, they threw it out the window, over the fence, in the trash bin.... Inside my purse was my digital camera, my keys, my driver's license, social security cards (for everyone), my bank cards, credit card.... I had no access to money all weekend... my mom loaned me money so I could finish xmas shopping. Then when my phone was almost out of charge I remembered the charger was in my purse too. *big frown*....
I know the children will enjoy christmas... and I will too when it gets here... Right now, though, stress!!
Sorry I couldn't be more cheerful, but i hope it helps to know you are not alone. Emmanuel.
Merry Christmas,
Loonybunny
Oh my goodness - that is totally crazy - I would go bananas without my purse never mind if it had all those things. I hope you find it. Keep us posted!!
This sounds a little crazy - but do you think it could be behind the bed? For some reason when we can't find something, we always look there and many times what DS was playing with falls behind his bed.
It is probably some place really obvious and stupid and you will find it!!
It HAS driven me bananas... so much so that i'm beginning to believe them that a monster took it... LOL. Everyone saw it on the kitchen counter at night and it was gone in the morning... so some time in them middle of the night is when it happen. ARGH.
I've been singing "I wanna know/where my purse is...." to the tune of "Whats On Your Mind" by Information Society....
going bananas,
Loonybunny
I am laughing so hard about the monster. Did you look in the kitchen trash? OMG. What a huge pain and inconvenience.
"I've been singing "I wanna know/where my purse is...." to the tune of "Whats On Your Mind" by Information Society...."
You know what, Loony? You missed your calling to be a wonderful musician/singer of some sort. That is definitely a great way to deal with it all and very cute, too. You are always singing!
Keep us posted!
same here - for the first year I invited ex-h with kids to have xmas here, (after he kindly invited me for tgiving as I have no family here), x-h forgot and they were invited to one of his family, and as thats what the kids wanted to do - they will come back to me early evening.
mom_uk2socal - Mom to DS22, DS19, DD16
I know dear.
For all of you sad Mommies out there ((((hugs))))
Hugs to all of the blue Mommies!!!
LoonyBunny-
~shrimpy
"A man who wants something will find a way; a man who doesn't will find an excuse." ~Stephen Dolley Jr.
~<
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