finally heard my first pickup line!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2005
finally heard my first pickup line!
1
Mon, 04-04-2005 - 11:56pm
Hi ladies,
I went out dancing this past weekend. My neighbor and I went to a really fun dance club. I was waiting for a drink and this (gorgeous!) guy walks up and says hi. I said hi too and he introduced himself and asked my name. I told him and he waited a few seconds and then said, "Are you Irish and scandinavian?" I said yeah a little bit of both plus a lot of others. He said, "Wow, you have a really unique look"
I thought that was pretty good-and considering how absolutely beautiful this man was and that he was talking to me! Oh, my!
He didn't stay too long after he found out I have 5 kids, I expected that though. And we totally had a blast, though no guys danced with me. I am so new to this that I didn't know a guy was hitting on you if he buys you a drink(which my hunk of a man did!!) My friend kept tellingme all these guys were checking me out. Of course I realize a bar is not the place to meet a soul mate(though I don't doubt it could happen there--I mean, hey, I was there!). It was just fun to be out there and feel like I was attractive to men still and to feel ok about me.
I have had a huge disappointment with my crush at work. He's now avoiding me. I think that's a good thing-I need space from him since I am so emotionally involved. I want so much more than he can give me. So, I'm gonna try not wanting anything at all from any man for a while at least. I've had enough heartbreak.
On that sad note. I guess I'll sign off for tonight. Thanks ladies.
All the Best,
jean
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-28-2005
Tue, 04-05-2005 - 11:00am

Jean,

It is the best feeling when you realize you are still attractive to men. I don't know the ages of your children but you (at least I did) just feel so like a Mom for so long, and not like a woman, that you tend to put that part of your personality aside, especially if you are in a bad relationship and don't feel attractive. And while you're right about not meeting your soulmate in a bar, sometimes just being out there and realizing you still have that side to you, can be a great boost to your self-esteem.

I felt like NOBODY would want to date a single mom but it hasn't been a problem. I have less kids than you, but still three is a lot and with full custody time is my biggest problem. But I know I feel better about myself now than I did throughout my marriage, and that self-confidence is totally attractive to men.

As far as the crush from work goes, don't let it get you down. You probably need some time to get to know and be comfortable with yourself as a single woman before you are ready to be in a serious relationship, and he is wise to be cautious. I just broke off with my "rebound" boyfriend and it was very difficult but I found that I didn't really want to find my next husband, just be by myself for a while, and it's not necesarily wise to get serious with the first man who treats you well. We will still see each other, just with the rule of being exclusive removed, and with it very up front that this is not going to end with marriage. He was really hurt at first, but called me after a few days and said after thinking things over he realized what I wanted was every man's dream...sex without commitment!! Ha ha, works for me too!
Good luck to you.

Jessie