The first date from a man's perspective

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-08-2008
The first date from a man's perspective
17
Sun, 03-09-2008 - 6:31pm

Here are some things I thought I would throw out about first dates and how I would look at things:



  1. If I pick a woman up and open up the car door for her, I would look to see if she made an attempt to open mine. I understand alot of cars open automatically but I would look to see if she still tried to open my door


  • I just saw it as an indicator if she was a considerate woman

  • I meet her on the first date and she is significantly different than she described herself or what her picture looked like


    • I've dated all kinds of women and am open-minded but I just want a woman to be honest with me. If she lied I would not call her back

  • She gets a phone call during the date


    • There may be a legitimate reason but I generally would view that as a reason not to call her back or cut the date short. I either turned my phone off or if I had a reason (being on call 24/7 like I was at my last job) I would tell her beforehand so she wouldn't view me answering the phone as being rude

  • She talks alot about an ex-boyfriend(s)


    • Makes me think she still like her ex; I'm more interested in hearing about what she likes, what her passions are, what her goals and dreams are, etc

    Pages

    iVillage Member
    Registered: 10-30-2004
    Sun, 03-09-2008 - 6:36pm
    Those are really good points.
    iVillage Member
    Registered: 05-13-2005
    Sun, 03-09-2008 - 6:55pm

    OOOH - these are good - thank you for sharing.

    Tell us more!

    The only comment about the phone is that she might have it on for kids. But I guess that is a good point and something to bring up if we have kids that might be calling.

    What is your opinion about the bill?

    iVillage Member
    Registered: 10-30-2004
    Sun, 03-09-2008 - 6:57pm
    He makes a good point about the door too.
    iVillage Member
    Registered: 05-13-2005
    Sun, 03-09-2008 - 7:01pm
    I was glad when he said that - because I always do! hehehe
    Avatar for myprecioustwo
    iVillage Member
    Registered: 04-08-2003
    Sun, 03-09-2008 - 7:11pm

    number three on this board is legit, because if you are dating a single mom with kids, our phone ALWAYS stays on in case of an emergency. Otherwise, yes, I agree. It goes two ways.

    iVillage Member
    Registered: 10-30-2004
    Sun, 03-09-2008 - 7:14pm
    I think the point he was making regarding cell phones is taking calls during dinner that aren't urgent.
    Avatar for myprecioustwo
    iVillage Member
    Registered: 04-08-2003
    Sun, 03-09-2008 - 7:14pm

    If I like the guy, I will open the door for him. If I don't, I won't and I look for guys to always open my doors. Unfortunately, it's becoming a rarity.


    Last night, 'the widower' and I were having a beer and I served him first and made sure his was always a little more fuller then mine. He mentioned how he noticed that and thought it was a mom thing. I said no, it's a german thing: you take care of your man first, before you take care of yourself (what I didn't mention is that it goes vice versa with the guy and the woman).

    iVillage Member
    Registered: 03-08-2008
    Sun, 03-09-2008 - 7:37pm
    first date man should definitely pay; after that I pay at least a few more times....but I think it depends on how you feel with each other. I would expect the woman to pay at some point after that.
    Avatar for myprecioustwo
    iVillage Member
    Registered: 04-08-2003
    Sun, 03-09-2008 - 7:44pm
    I start paying around the 6th date. I'll pay then every 3rd date thereafter or sometimes a whole outting or weekend together. Just to let them know I appreciate them too.
    iVillage Member
    Registered: 05-13-2005
    Sun, 03-09-2008 - 8:09pm
    Okay - good to know. I always have read and thought that if you like the guy you should let him pay on the first date. But then later on I like to cook and pay for some things too.

    Pages