The FUNNIEST PROFILE! LMAO!!!!
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| Mon, 07-09-2007 - 3:10pm |
Listed on match.com, from OBVIOUSLY a single guy. Of course, being a single mom I won't even contact him. Don't want a Daddy for my kids. LOL! I thought the profile was very funny and had to share. I have a feeling he might stay single awhile or maybe not....
OPPORTUNITY AVAILABLE TO THE FIRST CANDIDATE:
Looking for a dad for your 5 kids? inquire below! Not sure if you're crazy or not? well, let's find out! Manic depressive? outstanding! Drug habit? even better! Personal Hygiene low on your priority list? Bring it on! (Repressed lunacy and a predisposition to mind games also a plus.)
Spending all my money on you, as long as I can do your nails and rub your feet at the end of my day, while I wait with baited breath between your phone calls, is my idea of the perfect life.
You must also be a good liar, be able to steal from me without noticing (last check in my checkbook is always available), and not give a second thought to the consequences.
If you have a wandering eye, that will make me even more complete.
Nagging is most welcome, and I would really appreciate if you could make life as hard as possible, every waking minute of my existence. Hide my keys. Hog the remote. Ding my car. Call me without leaving a message. Be sure to block my way when I want to go somewhere. Don't listen to a word I say, while rolling your eyes at the ceiling.
As far as stalkers, it would be very thoughtful if you could call me so many times that I have to change my phone number. Also, please do show up uninvited and leave things on my doorstep. I love it.
looking forward to our miserable existence together.
don't delay! one or two witty comments, and I'm yours.
I am only an icebreaker away!!!
-R
ps: I won't need any free time for friends, as long I have you. So...HOLLA!
pss: good sense of humor is a must..which should be painfully obvious by now after reading this 'profile'!! haha

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Thanks for the laugh.
Wow.
I think that is sooo funny. Hopefully he'll get some bites from some women with a great sense of humor. It's nice to see something original now and again.
Priscilla
The poor thing! I wonder if it was one woman who did all of this or if he just keeps dating losers. Perhaps he thinks everyone shares his sense of humor?
Here's one I found 'window shopping' tonight on Match.
Yeah, I suppose... if you like hairy candy. Ewww!
~shrimpy
~shrimpy
"A man who wants something will find a way; a man who doesn't will find an excuse." ~Stephen Dolley Jr.
~<
It IS quite funny, actually! But I think the poor man has a bitter soul to go with all that sarcastic humor of his.
I'm sure though- that out of all of our hit-and-miss experiences in OLD (or any dating, for that matter), that we could probably write a female version of the same, with all the weirdos and dangers that we've all encountered at one time or another!
~shrimpy
~shrimpy
"A man who wants something will find a way; a man who doesn't will find an excuse." ~Stephen Dolley Jr.
~<
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