Giving big guy the news

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-10-2008
Giving big guy the news
13
Mon, 07-28-2008 - 7:15pm
Well it did not go so well. I felt bad. He was upset. Wanted to know if there was anything he could do to change my mind. I wish it were diff he is a great guy. He texted me today to say he would like to hang out as friends but I think that is a horrible idea considering he has other feelings for me. Sigh...I feel awful.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-08-2007
Mon, 07-28-2008 - 7:19pm

Ugh. I know- but you did the right thing. I'd email him and say you really enjoyed your times together but you feel it's best to not hang out. You can end the note just by saying you hope he finds ms right and thank him for being so kind to you.


Kuddos for doing what is right for you.

~Pacific~
~Pacific~
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-15-2008
Mon, 07-28-2008 - 7:31pm
You did the right thing.

JH

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-07-2005
Mon, 07-28-2008 - 7:43pm
In time friends could happen, but for now it's best to give him space. He's a nice guy and you had a good time, unfortunately, the chemistry wasn't there. Which sucks, but you can't change what you don't feel, and you don't want him to feel like you're using him either!
"Admire what you DO have, and stop asking for what you don't." Ds-age 8


Photobucket
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-22-2006
Mon, 07-28-2008 - 7:50pm
Oh Im sorry you feel awful but I really think from everything you wrote you did the best thing for both of you. If there is no chemistry you have to be honest about it and you have. Chin up, he will realize you did both of you a favor in time. In the meantime though I agree with Allison that I would give some space even if he says he wants to hang. He may just think he can sway you somehow and that wouldnt be healthy for either of you if you are sure about this.
BIG HUGS. I know it sucks to disappoint someone who is a genuinely good soul....
Lilypie - Personal picture
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2008
Mon, 07-28-2008 - 10:37pm

Being friends might be harder on him than he thinks. Especially when and if the day comes that you inform him you've met someone else.

Laurie

anonymous
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-24-2006
Mon, 07-28-2008 - 10:47pm
awwww (((HUGS))) that is not an easy thing to do. And I agree with you 100% it would be impossible to be just friends now, knowing he has feelings for you. He would hold out hope of changing your mind over time. I know, it happened. I was so dumb. You did the right thing, direct, gentle but direct and its not easy but it is life.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2005
Mon, 07-28-2008 - 11:39pm

"He texted me today to say he would like to hang out as friends but I think that is a horrible idea considering he has other feelings for me."

Agreed.

There is nothing more you can do - cease all contact and in a day you will forget about it. And he will be free to find someone whose feelings are mutual for him.

Dating IS a jungle - and you both tried - there is always that risk that one will be liked while the other is not.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-06-1998
Tue, 07-29-2008 - 7:56am
Oh you poor thing. I know it's horrible but as everyone has said you did do the right thing. As nice as he is you just can't conjure up feelings that do not exist.
Life sucks sometimes doesn't it .......

 



Tracy

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2004
Tue, 07-29-2008 - 10:15am
Im sorry. That had to be so hard.

Photobucket

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 07-29-2008 - 11:06am
You did the right thing chickie and the one thing I have learned over the years is that the right thing is hardly ever the EASY thing to do.
 

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