A Guy's Opening Line
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| Fri, 04-25-2008 - 8:47pm |
I saw this article on Yahoo and found it very interesting....
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A Guy's Opening Line: What Does It Mean? Posted Wed, Jan 30, 2008, 9:01 am PST
When a man first sets eyes on a woman that he likes and decides to make an approach, he's in for the emotional equivalent of an "American Idol" audition.
He's got mere seconds to make an impression and hope that his crush-object (you) will send him onto the next round - for more conversation, a drink, a number, and perhaps a first date.
He needs to do all that with the looming fear that the judge - you - will be harsher than Simon after the five-hundredth awful rendition of "I'll do it my way."
So how does a guy manage the risk? Typically, he'll pull out one of these four tricks from his arsenal. Here's what these strategies may say about him:
When he offers a compliment...
He's been instructed that the way to a woman's heart is through a well-constructed sentence about her eyes, hair, shoes, and fashion sense. So an opening of "great boots" is, of course, his initial tactic for conveying the message that he's a man who will appreciate everything you are, and everything you do on his behalf.
You can judge the intelligence of a man by whether he compliments something you control, like your second sense for accessorizing, or something you don't, like your eye color. The smart man compliments the woman's conscious choices, not the gifts of DNA (or the cosmetic surgeon).
When he tries a one-liner...
All of them are cheesy. All of them are unoriginal. All of them work about as well as lobbying reform in Washington. So why does he insist on asking if you're lost (because heaven is a long way away)? Because he's banking on the slim chance that you'll crack a smile.
He knows that women overwhelmingly want men who have a sense of humor, and since he doesn't have the seven hours to prove that he can offer witty banter, he presses the "play" button on his seven-second comedy routine to see if you'd like to sample some more of his material. Yes, it's a desperate measure, which often can imply a desperate man.
When he buys you a drink...
On the surface, it's just an $8 drink - and a fairly conspicuous bribe ($8 is worth 10 minutes of convo, isn't it?). But more than that, he wants to send the chest-thumping message that he can provide for you.
It's an old favorite, but the smoother and more confident man may just go ahead and order it up in hopes that you'll come to him, rather than asking if he can buy you a drink and risking that you'll answer in the negative.
When he asks you a question, any question...
He's feeling his way. A man can't always read the signs a woman gives off. So his main goal in the initial approach is to buy time ... time to talk, time for you to get interested, time for him to deliver his best material - during which time you're judging him in SO many ways! The question - if it's a good one - is his ticket in.
Surely, you can tell something about the man depending on the originality of his question. The trick for a man is to try to find the middle ground between the stupidly superficial ("crazy weather, today, huh?") and the needlessly provocative ("who are you voting for?"). If he can do that, then I hope you'll at least give him an answer - and a shot at asking a few more questions.
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When TG saw me the night we met.. he told me he knew he just had to meet me but he didn't know how... and he said he feels corny for saying it but he couldn't leave that night without saying something to me... and he laughs that his best line was "what's a beautiful girl like you doing here all alone...".... too funny.
From my point of view, i hadn't even noticed him yet.... i had made friends with some other people at the bar.. they were singing karaoke and i was cheering them on... so when he approached me... I said, "well, i'm not alone. those are my new friends singing..."
Then he said, "can I buy you a drink"... and he admitted it was so he could have a few more minutes to talk to me..... but little did he know that i had been trying to get a drink from the bartender but she kept ignoring me... so he was actually being very helpful.
Then of course i tripped on the steps, broke my foot and the rest is history...
So... in analyzing his approach based on the article... He started with a question (wanting to talk) and then used the buying a drink technique... (to show he's a provider)... i believe it, even that first night at the emergency room, he got me every snack from the vending machine.. because he didn't know what i liked...
I really like this guy. *silly grin*
What has been you experience?
Loonybunny
Loonybunny,
I've had some of the same lines said to me. The ones that didn't work were "I'm in love with you. One night with me and you'll forget about any other guy", this from someone I wasn't attracted to. Another one was "So are you gonna make out with me in the parking lot...I can get free concert tickets because my sister-in-law works for XYZ."
The lines that did work were "What band is playing?" (a local band in a bar) then later on said, "I'm gonna set you up with my friend here." (the guy's friend talked to me first and introduced us). Another guy who was very cute just came up to me and said, "How are you doing?" and later on kissed me right there in the bar.
I've also gone up to a couple of guys and told them they were cute, started a conversation and we exchanged numbers.